Subject: People (Page 9)

The hardest thing to stop is a temporary chairman.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
People Situations

Old maids sweeten their tea with scandal.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
People

So thoroughly corrupt, every time he smiles an angel gets gonorrhea!

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer
Insults People

Years ago, manhood was an opportunity for achievement, and now it is a problem to be overcome.

(1942 – ) humorist & radio broadcaster
Men People

All men are equal before fish.

(1929 – 1933) 31st U.S. president, humanitarian
Animals People

Be normal, and the crowd will accept you… be deranged, and they will make you their leader.

(1964 – ) American comedian & actor
Characteristics People

The man’s desire for a son is usually nothing but the wish to duplicate himself in order that such a remarkable pattern may not be lost to the world.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist
Characteristics Men People Relationships

If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Characteristics People Rednecks Things

Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else… and usually is.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Age People

A man who catches a big fish doesn't go home through an alley.

(1918 – 2002) advice columnist
Characteristics People

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Age Conflict Friends Killing People

I hate to see a young man get ahead on the basis of a famous family name.

(1932 – 2009) U.S. senator (Massachusetts)
People Self Success

That man is a real charmer, a regular Don Coyote.

Malaprops People

Burt Reynolds once asked me out… I was in his room.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
People Relationships

If God were suddenly condemned to live the life which he has inflicted on men, he would kill himself.

(1824 – 1895) French writer
Beliefs God Life People

When women kiss it always reminds me of prize fighters shaking hands.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
People Women

What would bug a guy from the Taliban more than seeing a gay woman in a suit surrounded by Jews?

(1958 – ) comedian, actress & television host
People Self

Women prefer men who have something tender about them – especially the legal kind.

Men Money People Women

A bore is one who has the power of speech but not the capacity for conversation.

(1804 – 1881) British prime minister, politician & author
Characteristics Communication Conversation People Speech

Few things in life are more embarrassing than the necessity of having to inform an old friend that you have just got engaged to his fiancee.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Characteristics People Relationships

Women need a reason to have sex; men just need a place.

(1948 – ) comedian, actor, writer, producer & film director
Men Sex Women