Subject: People (Page 90)

I did think about adopting… an 18-year-old girl from Thailand, whose hobbies include vacuuming and some light dusting.

(1964 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor
Girls Housework People Relationships

I envy people who drink… at least they have something to blame everything on.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Alcohol Food/Drink People

A committee takes hours to put into minutes what can be done in seconds.

People Time

In order not to be called a flirt, she always yielded easily.

(1754 – 1838) French bishop, politician & diplomat
People

Some do; some don’t.

Murphy’s Laws People

I met this guy who said he loved children, then I found out he was on parole for it.

American comedian & writer
Children People

New Year's Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot… unless, of course, those tests come back positive.

(1950 – ) comedian & television host
Health People

The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest.

(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Men People

You might be a redneck if… you need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Appearance Body People Rednecks

It is the loose ends with which men hang themselves.

(1900 – 1948) novelist (wife of writer F. Scott Fitzgerald)
Men People

If my books had been any worse, I should not have been invited to Hollywood, and if they had been any better, I should not have come.

(1888 – 1959) detective novelist & screenwriter
Books Communication Self

The first time Adam had a chance, he laid the blame on woman.

(1879 – 1964) British politician
Characteristics Women

Adult: One who has ceased to grow vertically, but not horizontally.

writer
Age Appearance Body People

Never mind, dear, we're all made the same, though some more than others.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
People

My face looks like a wedding cake left out in the rain.


(1907 – 1973) poet & critic
Appearance Body People Self

Snobs talk as if they had begotten their ancestors.

(1897 – 1980) American journalist and historian & newspaper editor
Characteristics People

I’m English, but I want to let you know that even though I’m English, I’m not here to solve a murder mystery.

comedian
England People Places

Everyone I like stays the hell away from me.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Age Friends People

Apparently we love our own cell phones but we hate everyone else’s.

(John Bloom) (1953 – ) American film critic, writer & actor
People Self Things

A man's face is his autobiography; a womans face is her work of fiction.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Men People Women

I’m not the type who wants to go back to the land… I’m the type who wants to go back to the hotel.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
People Self Situations