Subject: People » Women (Page 9)

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a net.

American playwright, television writer & author
Men People Women

Everybody knows that if female genitalia could speak, it would sound exactly like Enya.

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer
People Women

All women dress like their mothers, that is their tragedy; no man ever does, that is his.

English author, actor, humorist & playwright
Appearance Clothing Men People Women

A homeless guy asked me for 2 pounds, so I gave him 1.67 because that’s what a woman would get paid for doing the same job.

British comedian
Men Money People Women Work

Women are like elephants to me: nice to look at, but I wouldn’t want to own one.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
People TV/Movie Quotes Women

Women like silent men; they think they’re listening.

(1899 – 1974) French screenwriter, teacher & journalist
Men People Women

Show me a woman with both feet planted firmly on the ground – and I'll show you a girl who can't get her knickers off.

(1958 – ) Australian author
Characteristics People Women

Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself.

(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Situations Women

If women don't find you handsome they should at least find you handy.

(1945 – ) Canadian comedian & actor
People TV/Movie Quotes Women

The fantasy of every Australian man is to have two women – one cleaning and the other dusting.

Australian comedian & actress
Housework People Women

Here's to our wives and girlfriends… may they never meet!

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Marriage People Wives Women

I took this girl to dinner, and I heard that women like it when you order for them, so I was like, 'I'll have the special, and she's not getting anything tonight.'

(1981 – ) American comedian, writer & actor
Food/Drink People Situations Women

Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men – the other 999 follow women.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Characteristics Men Women

A woman can smell mink through six inches of lead.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Clothing Money People Women

Being a woman is a terribly difficult task since it consists principally in dealing with men.

(1857 – 1924) English (Polish-Ukrainian-born) novelist
Men People Problems Women

The littlest things can set women off – like, “Hey, the waitress is hot! I bet we could get her to come home with us.” Or, “How much does your mom weigh? I want to know what I’m getting into.”

(1980 – ) American actor, comedian & musician
People TV/Movie Quotes Women

Italian women never die – they just shrink out of existence.

(1958 – ) American comedian, actress & jazz musician
Death People Women

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby.

(1938 – 1981) American actress
Men People Women

I'd never buy my girl a watch… she's already got a clock over the stove.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball People Relationships Sports Women

A woman is the only thing I am afraid of that I know will not hurt me.

(1809 – 1865) 16th U.S. president
Fear People Women

It's interesting to speculate how it developed that in two of the most anti-feminist institutions, the church and the law court, the men are wearing the dresses.

(1916 – 2000) American lawyer & activist
Appearance Clothing Law Religion Women