Subject: Places » America (Page 4)

I’m thrilled that the American people stopped him from running this time; as a citizen, I’m happy about that, but as a comic, I weep.

(1948 – ) stand-up comedian, actor, author & playwright
America Elections/Voting Government People Politicians

We will invest in our people, quality education, job opportunity, family, neighborhood, and yes, a thing we call America.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
America Misspokements Places

The difference between America and England is that Americans think 100 years is a long time, while the English think 100 miles is a long way.

Irish music columnist & journalist
America England Places

I sometimes think that the saving grace of America lies in the fact that the overwhelming majority of Americans are possessed of two great qualities – a sense of humor and a sense of proportion.

(1882 – 1945) 32nd U.S. president
America Places

The United States is like the guy at the party who gives cocaine to everyone and still nobody likes him.

(1948 – 1990) comedian
America Places

We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless you count maybe 25 or 30 little scuzzball countries like Scotland that we could vaporize in seconds if we felt like it.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
America Health Places

Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands… but English women only hope to find in their butlers.

(1874 – 1965) English dramatist & novelist
America Characteristics England Husbands Women

In a country as big as the United States, you can find fifty examples of anything.

America Murphy’s Laws Places

Drugs have taught an entire generation of Americans the metric system.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Activities America Drugs Education People

A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won’t cross the street to vote in a national election.

(1915 – 1977) columnist, writer & actor
America Democracy Elections/Voting Government Places War World

… as American as English muffins and French toast.

(1935 – ) English critic & author
America Places

If you surveyed a hundred typical middle-aged Americans, I bet you'd find that only two of them could tell you their blood types, but every last one of them would know the theme song from The Beverly Hillbillies.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
America Intelligence People

The best reason I can think of for not running for President of the United States is that you have to shave twice a day.

(1900 – 1965) diplomat & Democratic politician
America Appearance Government Places President

In America, your work determines your marks; in Soviet Russia, Marx determines your work!

(1951 – ) Soviet-American comedian
America Places

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
America Intelligence Language Military Places

New Jersey is to America as America is to the world.

(1977 – ) American television producer, writer & comedian
America Emotions Places World

We have a President, perhaps for the very first time since the founding of our republic, who doesn’t appear to believe that America is the greatest earthly force for good the world has ever known.

(1964 – ) U.S. governor (Alaska) commentator & author
America Misspokements

In America you can always find a party; in Russia the party always finds you.

(1951 – ) Soviet-American comedian
America Places Wordplay

America: A nation that conceives many odd inventions for getting somewhere but can think of nothing to do when it gets there.

America Definitions Places

If you persecute somebody just because they might look a little different, then you are no better than our country's founding fathers.

American comedian & writer
America Characteristics Places

First of all, I don't see America having problems.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president
America Places Problems