Subject: Places » Canada

Britons put up with, Americans fix, while Canadians cope.

(1901 – 1978) anthropologist
Canada People Places

When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me; I said, “Well, what do you need?”

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Arms Canada Places Things

Canadians are Americans with no Disneyland.

(1937 – 2012) New Zealand author
America Canada Places

Quebec is part of Canada as much as a cat in the mouth of a crocodile is a part of the crocodile

(1942 – ) Canadian politician
Canada Places

Canada is an entire country named Doug.

(1959 – ) American actor, stand-up comedian & television host
Canada Places

Canada? I don't even know what street it's on.

(1899 – 1947) American gangster
Canada Places

When they said Canada, I thought it was up in the mountains somewhere.

(1926 – 1962) actress, sex symbol
Canada Misspokements Places

I often confuse Americans and Canadians… by using long words.

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
America Canada People Places

In any world menu, Canada must be considered the vichyssoise of nations – it's cold, half-French, and difficult to stir.

(1913 – 1987) Canadian journalist
Canada Places

The great themes of Canadian history are as follows: Keeping the Americans out, keeping the French in, and trying to get the Natives to somehow disappear.

(1964 – ) Canadian writer & novelist
America Canada History People Places

We'll explain the appeal of curling to you if you explain the appeal of the National Rifle Association to us.

(1945 – ) Canadian radio personality
Canada Places

You're looking at a very proud Canadian who is very proud of the educational system in Canadia.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Canada Education Learning

America's attic.

(1915 – 1979) English-born Canadian poet
Canada Places

Canada is like your attic, you forget that it's up there, but when you go, it's like "Oh man, look at all this great stuff!"

Canada Places

A Canadian is merely an unarmed American with health care. 

Canadian comedian & author
America Canada People Places

It’s going to be a great country when they finish unpacking it.

(1943 – ) Canadian author & newsman
Canada Places

In Pierre Elliott Trudeau, Canada has at last produced a political leader worthy of assassination.

(1912 – 2006) Romanian-born Canadian writer
Canada Insults

I'm the best heavyweight in Canada and I'll still be the best when I'm dead seven years.

Canadian boxing champion
Boxing Canada Places Sports

I’ve been to Canada, and I’ve always gotten the impression that I could take the country over in about two days.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian
Canada Places

Coming from Canada, being a writer and Jewish as well, I have impeccable paranoia credentials.

(1931 – 2001) Canadian author, screenwriter & essayist
Canada Characteristics People Places

Wherever you go in the world, you just have to say you’re Canadian and people laugh.

(1950 – 1994) Canadian actor & comedian
Canada Emotions Laughter Places