Subject: Places » England (Page 2)

A Frenchwoman, when double-crossed, will kill her rival; the Italian woman would rather kill her deceitful lover; the Englishwoman simply breaks off relations – but they all will console themselves with another man.

(1899 – 1978) French actor
England People Places Relationships

If an Englishman gets run down by a truck he apologizes to the truck.

(1934 – ) comedian
England People Places

In England there are sixty different religions and only one sauce.

(1563 – 1608) Italian Catholic priest
Beliefs Cooking England Food/Drink Places Religion

The English instinctively admire any man who has no talent and is modest about it.

(1877 – 1947) British diarist & critic
Characteristics England People Places

England, the heart of a rabbit in the body of a lion.

England Places

Also-ran: A British athlete.

British writer, cartoonist, poet & performer
England Places Wordplay

The old English belief that if a thing is unpleasant it is automatically good for you.

(1908 – 1986) English cartoonist, author, art critic & stage designer
England Places

Contrary to popular belief, English women do not wear tweed nightgowns.

(1897-1987) actress & comedian
England Places

The House of Lords is like a glass of champagne that has stood for five days.

(1883 – 1967) British prime minister & politician
England Government Places

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia?

(1771 – 1845) English writer & Anglican clergyman
Beer England Food/Drink Places

Apparently 1 in 3 Britons are conceived in an IKEA bed, which is mad because those places are really well lit

English comedian, writer & actor
England Places

The English think incompetence is the same thing as sincerity.

(1908 – 1999) English writer
Characteristics England People Places

There is one thing on earth more terrible than English music, and that is English painting.

(1797 – 1856) German critic & poet
Art England Entertainment Food/Drink Insults Places

The difference between America and England is that Americans think 100 years is a long time, while the English think 100 miles is a long way.

Irish music columnist & journalist
America England Places

Even today, well-brought-up English girls are taught by their mothers to boil all veggies for at least a month and a half, just in case one of the dinner guests turns up without his teeth.

(1935 – ) columnist, journalist & novelist
England Food/Drink Places

All Englishmen talk as if they’ve got a bushel of plums stuck in their throats, and then after swallowing them get constipated from the pips.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
England Insults Places Speech

We have really everything in common with America nowadays, except, of course, language.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
America England Language Places

An Englishmen thinks seated; a Frenchmen standing; an American pacing, an Irishman, afterwards.

(1858 – 1932) American physicist, physician & humorist
America England Intelligence People Thinking

Talking to the British about sex is like talking to Americans about reading; nobody does it so why talk about it?

(1959 – ) American actor, stand-up comedian & television host
England People Places Sex

If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Communication England People Places Speech

There are three golden rules for parliamentary speakers: “Stand up. Speak up. Shut up.”

(1855 – 1949) British politician
Communication England Places Speech