Subject: Places » England (Page 2)

The French, they say, live to eat; the English, on the other hand, eat to die.

(1949 – ) English novelist
Eating England People Places

Hell is a place where the motorists are French, the policemen are German, and the cooks are English.

England

English? Who needs that? I’m never going to England.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Communication England Language Places

The English are not very spiritual people, so they invented cricket to give them some idea of eternity.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
England People Places Sports Time

Brexit is a terrible name… sounds like cereal you eat when you are constipated.

(1978 – ) English stand-up comedian & actress
England Places Situations

All Englishmen talk as if they’ve got a bushel of plums stuck in their throats, and then after swallowing them get constipated from the pips.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
England Insults Places Speech

Contrary to popular belief, English women do not wear tweed nightgowns.

(1897-1987) actress & comedian
England Places

The difference between America and England is that Americans think 100 years is a long time, while the English think 100 miles is a long way.

Irish music columnist & journalist
America England Places

A Frenchwoman, when double-crossed, will kill her rival; the Italian woman would rather kill her deceitful lover; the Englishwoman simply breaks off relations – but they all will console themselves with another man.

(1899 – 1978) French actor
England People Places Relationships

The one great principle of the English law is, to make business for itself.

(1812 – 1870) English novelist
England Government Law Places

Trains in Britain can be late for all sorts of reasons: speed restrictions, livestock on the track, or a totally substandard rail infrastructure that’s publicly funded, privately run and answerable to no one… all sorts of reasons.

(1979 – ) English comedian & actor
England Places

There are three golden rules for parliamentary speakers: “Stand up. Speak up. Shut up.”

(1855 – 1949) British politician
Communication England Places Speech

Coffee in England always tastes like a chemistry experiment.

(1890 – 1976) British crime writer of novels, short stories & plays
England Food/Drink Places

If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Communication England People Places Speech

The English think soap is civilization.

(1834 – 1896) German historian & political writer
England Insults Places

I’m English, but I want to let you know that even though I’m English, I’m not here to solve a murder mystery.

comedian
England People Places

The English never smash in a face; they merely refrain from asking it to dinner.

(1910 – 1997) American writer
England Food/Drink Insults Places

What a pity it is that we have no amusements in England but vice and religion.

(1771 – 1845) English writer & Anglican clergyman
England Places

The Englishman who has lost his fortune is said to have died of a broken heart.

(1803 – 1882) essayist, poet, & philosopher
Emotions England Money People Places Wealth

Anyone who has been to an English public school will always feel comparatively at home in prison.

(1903 – 1966) English writer
Education England Places School

The English contribution to world cuisine – the chip.

(1939 – ) English actor, comedian, writer & producer
England Food/Drink Places