Subject: Places (Page 2)

When the American people get through with the English language, it will look as if it had been run over by a musical comedy.

(1867 – 1936) author & humorist
America Communication Language Places

I was so poor… in my neighborhood, the rainbow was in black and white!

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Money Places Poverty

The best research [for playing a drunk] is being a British actor for 20 years.

(1933 – ) English actor
Acting Alcohol Food/Drink Places

You might be a redneck if… you’re banned from the Memphis Zoo because you disturb the monkeys.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Animals People Places Rednecks

America: A land where a citizen will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, and won’t cross the street to vote in a national election.

America Definitions Places

The difference between America and England is that Americans think 100 years is a long time, while the English think 100 miles is a long way.

Irish music columnist & journalist
America England Places

You always find something in the last place you look.

Murphy’s Laws Places Things

In Milan, traffic lights are instructions; in Rome, they are suggestions; in Naples, they are Christmas decorations.

(1942 – ) Italian politician
Places

England, the heart of a rabbit in the body of a lion.

England Places

In America you can always find a party; in Russia the party always finds you.

(1951 – ) Soviet-American comedian
America Places Wordplay

America: The only country that matters. If you want to experience other ‘cultures,’ use an atlas or a ham radio.

(1970 – ) American actor, writer & carpenter
America Places TV/Movie Quotes

New Jersey is to America as America is to the world.

(1977 – ) American television producer, writer & comedian
America Emotions Places World

North Korea is the country that the monkeys in The Wizard of Oz came from.

(1948 – ) stand-up comedian, actor, author & playwright
Places

The rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage.

(1932 – ) American political satirist & comedian
Places

There are only two occasions when Americans respect privacy, especially in presidents; those are prayer and fishing.

(1929 – 1933) 31st U.S. president, humanitarian
America Characteristics Situations

All politics is local.

Government Murphy’s Laws Places Politics

Terrible tragedy in the South Seas… three million people trapped alive!

(1947 – ) New Zealand cartoonist
Places

A small town is a place where there’s no place to go where you shouldn’t.

(1928 - ) American pianist, writer, composer & music producer
Places

Hell is paved with good samaritans.

Places

A spa hotel? It’s like a normal hotel, only in reception there’s a picture of a pebble.

(1968 – ) Welsh comedian
Places

I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me.


(1885 – 1945) U.S. Army general
Conflict Places War