Subject: Places (Page 44)

In Russia a man is called reactionary if he objects to having his property stolen and his wife and children murdered.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Communication Government Places

Thank God we're living in a country where the sky's the limit, the stores are open late and you can shop in bed thanks to television.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
America Places Television

Talking to the British about sex is like talking to Americans about reading; nobody does it so why talk about it?

(1959 – ) American actor, stand-up comedian & television host
England People Places Sex

I knew these Siamese twins; they moved to England, so the other one could drive.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Autos Driving England Places

North Korea is the country that the monkeys in The Wizard of Oz came from.

(1948 – ) stand-up comedian, actor, author & playwright
Places

Canada is like your attic, you forget that it's up there, but when you go, it's like "Oh man, look at all this great stuff!"

Canada Places

If all the nations in the world are in debt, where did all the money go?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Money Places World

All the world’s a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.

(1880 – 1964) Irish dramatist
Entertainment Life World

Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees.

(1947 – ) comedian & television host
Places

You know it is summer in Ireland when the rain gets warmer.

(1892 – 1992) American film & television producer & director
Places Science/Weather

You might be a redneck if… you’re banned from the Memphis Zoo because you disturb the monkeys.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Animals People Places Rednecks

I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.

(1927 – ) magician & comedy writer
Children People Places

You might be a redneck if… directions to your house include "turn off the paved road.”

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Places Rednecks

I might just fade into Bolivian, you know what I mean?

(1966 – ) American boxing champion
Malaprops Places

Strip the phony tinsel off Hollywood and you'll find the real tinsel underneath.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Hollywood Places

The Americans are a funny lot; they drink whiskey to keep them warm, then they put ice in it to make it cool; then they put some sugar in it to make it sweet and then they put a slice of lemon in it to make it sour, then they say, “Here’s to you” and drink it themselves.

(1904 – 1976) Indian politician
America People Places

The greatest man who ever came out of Plymouth Corner, Vermont.

(1857 – 1938) American lawyer
Communication Places

There are only three ages for women in Hollywood – Babe, District Attorney, and Driving Miss Daisy.

(1945 – ) American actress, film director & producer
Entertainment Hollywood Places

Three o’clock in the morning, you can get truck tires, falafel and a bag of heroin – in the same store.

(1968 – ) American stand-up comedian, radio personality, author & actor
New York City Places Shopping

I was born in Alabama, but I only lived there for a month before I'd done everything there was to do.

(1959 – ) American comedian
Places

A farm is an irregular patch of nettles bounded by short-term notes, containing a fool and his wife who didn’t know enough to stay in the city.

(1904 – 1979) Jewish-American humorist, author & screenwriter
Definitions Places Things