Subject: Places (Page 46)

We've got stained glass windows in our house; it's those damned pigeons.

(1919 – 1985) Scottish comedian & actor
Animals Places

Hell is a place where the motorists are French, the policemen are German, and the cooks are English.

England

I love Mexico because it’s a giant dollar store.

(1965 – ) American comedian
Places Shopping

We have a firm commitment to Europe; we are a part of Europe.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Misspokements Places

You’re probably aware that Britain stopped evolving gastronomically around the year 1242.

(1977 – ) British political comedian & television host
Food/Drink Places

There is no question that there is an unseen world; the problem is, how far is it from midtown and how late is it open?

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Beliefs Places

Here [in Paris] they hang a man first, and try him afterward.

(1622 – 1673) French playwright & actor
Government Law Places

It's a scientific fact; for every year a person lives in Hollywood, they lose two points of their IQ.

(1924 – 1984) American author
Hollywood Intelligence Places

When you're born into this world, you're given a ticket to the freak show; if you're born in America you get a front row seat.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
America Places

Room service has an unlisted number.

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Places

Beware of gifts bearing Greeks.

David Gerrold (1944 – ) science fiction author
People Places Things

Other states are trying to abolish the death penalty… mine's putting in an express lane.

(1956 – ) American stand-up comedian
Places

My parents were English; we were too poor to be British.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
England Places