Subject: Places (Page 7)

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia?

(1771 – 1845) English writer & Anglican clergyman
Beer England Food/Drink Places

If you buy your July 4 supplies at Walmart you can celebrate our independence from Britain and our dependence on China at the same time.

(1958 – ) American writer, comedian, satirist & actor
Places

Here [in Paris] they hang a man first, and try him afterward.

(1622 – 1673) French playwright & actor
Government Law Places

I live so far out of town, the mailman mails me my letters.

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Places

You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America’s Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn’t want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named ‘Bush,’ ‘Dick,’ and ‘Colon.’

(1965 – ) comedian, actor, screenwriter, television producer & director
Places Situations World

Canadians are generally indistinguishable from Americans, and the surest way of telling the two apart is to make that observation to a Canadian.

Canadian physician & professor
People Places

A Canadian is merely an unarmed American with health care. 

Canadian comedian & author
America Canada People Places

Canada is all right really, though not for the whole weekend.

(1870 – 1916) British writer
Canada Places

The Norwegian language has been described as German spoken underwater.

Communication Language Places

In Australia, not reading poetry is the national pastime.

(1905 – 1978) American author of children’s books & poetry
Communication People Places Reading/Writing

I got wasted last night, and I hit an animal with my car… in the lobby of Caesar's Palace.

(1965 – ) American stand-up comedian, actor, director & author
Animals Entertainment Places

The first place to look for anything is the last place you would expect to find it.

Murphy’s Laws Places Things

Experts in advanced countries underestimate by a factor of 2 to 4 the ability of people in underdeveloped countries to do anything technical.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Places

In Seattle, they have a saying: 'If you don't like the weather, wait five minutes and then shoot yourself in the face.'

(1964 – ) American stand-up comedian
Places Science/Weather

Christine Todd Whitman had to resign as the head of the EPA; you know, when the governor of New Jersey decides the environment is hopeless, you gotta really think that one through.

(1965 – 2010) American stand-up comedian & television personality
Places Situations

There is no room for amateurs… even in crossing the streets.

(1934 – ) American actor
New York City Places

A bunch of people in New York said, 'Gee, I'm enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn't cold enough, let's go west.' on how Chicago got started

(1957 – 2007) American stand-up comedian & actor
Places Situations

What do you call an honest Iranian businessman? … Asif.

(1965 – ) British-Iranian comedian, actor & writer
Beliefs Honesty People Places

Leave it to the Germans – even their appliances crave power.

(1940 – 2018) English-American actor & comedian
Places TV/Movie Quotes

Of course, America had often been discovered before Columbus, but it had always been hushed up.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
America Insults Places

You gotta live somewhere.

(1948 – ) American stand-up comedian, writer & actor
Places