Subject: Problems

After you've heard two eyewitness accounts of an automobile accident, you begin to worry about history.

(1953 – ) comedian & actor
Accidents Autos History

If on an actuarial basis there is a 50-50 chance that something will go wrong, it will actually go wrong nine times out of ten.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.

(1939 – ) comedian, actress, writer & producer
Life Problems

Whatever a parent does is wrong.

Failure Family Murphy’s Laws Parents Problems Young

I broke a leg one time… spilled coffee all over.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Accidents Problems

A $300 picture tube will protect a 10¢ fuse by blowing first.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

The reliability of machinery is inversely proportional to the number and significance of any persons watching it.

Murphy’s Laws People Problems

All great discoveries are made by mistake

Corollary: The greater the funding, the longer it takes to make the mistake.

Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems

If most auto accidents happen within five miles of home, why don’t we move ten miles away?

Accidents Autos Problems Things

Inside every large problem is a small problem struggling to get out.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Situations

If there is anything disagreeable going on, men are sure to get out of it.

Men Murphy’s Laws People Problems

In this world there are winners and losers – and, of course, ‘the others’, who comprise the majority.

(1967 – ) English comedian
Failure People Success

Nothing you can’t spell will ever work.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Problems

Envelopes and stamps which don't stick when you lick them will stick to other things when you don't want them to.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Things

If we don’t succeed, we run the risk of failure.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Communication Failure Misspokements Speech Success

I don't believe in astrology; the only stars I can blame for my failures are those that walk about the stage.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Failure

Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.

(1920 – ) Hungarian writer
Problems

If Gladstone fell into the Thames, that would be a misfortune, and if anybody pulled him out, that, I suppose, would be a calamity.

(1804 – 1881) British prime minister, politician & author
Accidents Insults Problems

Nature never makes any blunders, when she makes a fool she means it.

(1772 – 1851) American Presbyterian theologian & professor
Fools Intelligence Mistakes Problems

The most expensive component is the one that breaks.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

Important letters that contain no errors will develop errors in the mail.
Corollary: Corresponding errors will show up in the duplicate while the boss is reading it.

Communication Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems