Subject: Problems (Page 14)

A malfunctioning car will stop displaying symptoms of imminent breakdown when driven to within one-quarter mile of a garage.

Autos Murphy’s Laws Problems Things

We made too many wrong mistakes.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Mistakes Yogi-isms

Swallow a toad in the morning and you will encounter nothing more disgusting the rest of the day.

(1741 – 1794) French writer
Problems

When the product is destined to fail, the delivery system will perform perfectly.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Things

For every complex problem, there is a solution that is clear, simple, and wrong.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

To err is human; to purr, feline.

(1930 – ) American author and billiard player, teacher & commentator
Animals Cats Mistakes Problems

If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Failure Success

A dropped power tool will always land on the concrete instead of the soft ground (if outdoors) or the carpet (if indoors) – unless it is running, in which case it will fall on something it can damage (like your foot).

Accidents Murphy’s Laws Things

Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.

(1769 – 1821) French general & politician
Mistakes People

He's a man who was a failure until he was 40 years old, which looks really good on your resume – if you're a comic.

(1948 – ) stand-up comedian, actor, author & playwright
Failure Problems

Well, I screwed it up real good, didn't I?

(1913 – 1994) 37th U.S. president
Mistakes People Problems Self

If I could kick the person in the tail that causes me the most problems I could not sit down for a week.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
People Problems Self

It isn't that things will necessarily go wrong (Murphy's Law), but rather that they will take so much more time and effort than you think if they are not to go wrong.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Time

No one is listening until you make a mistake.

Communication Mistakes Problems

The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong, is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at or repair.

(1952 – 2001) English writer, dramatist, & musician
Failure Problems

I am not part of the problem, I am a Republican.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Communication Misspokements Problems Speech

Experience is the name every one gives to their mistakes.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Mistakes Problems

If the probability of success is not almost one, then it is damn near zero.

Failure Murphy’s Laws Success

The leak in the roof is never in the same location as the drip.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

For every problem science solves, it creates ten new one.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

When you’ve made gravy under gunfire, you can do anything.

(1916 – 2000) English music hall performer, comedian & actor
Problems TV/Movie Quotes