Subject: Problems (Page 18)

Envelopes and stamps which don't stick when you lick them will stick to other things when you don't want them to.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Things

If you can't fix it with duct tape you haven’t used enough.

Problems Situations

Trouble strikes in series of threes, but when working around the house the next job after a series of three is not the fourth job – it's the start of a brand new series of three.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Work

Some problems are so complex that you have to be highly intelligent and well informed just to be undecided about them.

(1919 – 1990) educator & writer
Intelligence Problems

Life is just one damned thing after another.

(1856 – 1915) writer, publisher, artist & philosopher
Life Problems

Whatever plan one makes, there is a hidden difficulty somewhere.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

If you are attempting the impossible, you will fail

Failure Murphy’s Laws Problems

When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Failure Murphy’s Laws Problems

Anytime you wish to demonstrate something, the number of faults is proportional to the number of viewers.

Murphy’s Laws People Problems

If you think there's a solution, you're part of the problem.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Problems

Any idiot can face a crisis – it’s this day-to-day living that wears you out.

(1860 – 1904) Russian short-story writer, playwright & physician
Problems

When you’ve made gravy under gunfire, you can do anything.

(1916 – 2000) English music hall performer, comedian & actor
Problems TV/Movie Quotes

Everything is in a state of utter dishevelment.

Life Murphy’s Laws Problems

The great advantage of being in a rut is that when one is in a rut, one knows exactly where one is.

1867 – 1931) English novelist
Failure Problems

A dropped power tool will always land on the concrete instead of the soft ground (if outdoors) or the carpet (if indoors) – unless it is running, in which case it will fall on something it can damage (like your foot).

Accidents Murphy’s Laws Things

When life gives you lemons, just say ‘Fuck the lemons’ and bail.

(1969 - ) American actor, comedian, & screenwriter
Life Problems TV/Movie Quotes

A failure will not appear till a unit has passed final inspection.

Failure Murphy’s Laws

1. Nothing minor ever happens to a car on the weekend. 2. Nothing minor ever happens to a car on a trip. 3. Nothing minor ever happens to a car.

Autos Murphy’s Laws Problems

If you drop something, it will never reach the ground.

Accidents Murphy’s Laws Problems

Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.

Problems

No matter how long it takes for you to get back to pick up the shoes the shoemaker will tell you that they won't be ready until tomorrow.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Time