Subject: Problems (Page 20)

When things are going well, something will go wrong.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

To err is human… and to blame it on a computer is even more so.

(1927 – ) magician & comedy writer
Computers Failure Mistakes Things

Dilemma: A politician trying to save both his faces at once.

Definitions Politicians Problems

1. Anyone else who can be blamed should be blamed.
2. Anything that can go wrong will go wrong faster with computers.
3. Whenever a computer can be blamed, it should be blamed.

Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems

You only have a problem if you think it is a problem.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

Anything dropped in the bathroom will fall in the toilet.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Accidents Problems

All of the troubles that some people have in life is that which they married into.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Marriage Problems

They're funny things, accidents; you never have them till you're having them.

fictional character from the book series by A. A. Milne
Accidents Problems

To err is human; to really foul things up takes a computer.

Computers Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems Things

For every complex problem, there is a solution that is clear, simple, and wrong.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

This is a crisis, a large crisis. In fact… it’s a twelve-story crisis with a magnificent entrance hall, carpeted throughout; twenty-four hour porterage and an enormous sign on the roof saying ‘This is a Large Crisis.’

(1955 – ) English actor
Problems TV/Movie Quotes

To err is human, but it feels divine.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Emotions Problems

A computer makes as many mistakes in two seconds as 20 men working 20 years.

Computers Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Things Time

If anything just cannot go wrong, it will anyway.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

Getting caught is the mother of invention.

(1930 – ) American author and billiard player, teacher & commentator
Mistakes Problems Situations

When the inventor of the drawing board messed things up, what did he go back to?

(1928 – 2003) English entertainer
Mistakes Things

He's completely unspoiled by failure.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Failure Insults

For every problem science solves, it creates ten new one.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

We made too many wrong mistakes.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Mistakes Yogi-isms

To err is human; to purr, feline.

(1930 – ) American author and billiard player, teacher & commentator
Animals Cats Mistakes Problems

In this world there are winners and losers – and, of course, ‘the others’, who comprise the majority.

(1967 – ) English comedian
Failure People Success