Subject: Problems (Page 20)

Those who don’t study the past will repeat its errors; those who do study it will find OTHER ways to err.

Murphy’s Laws Past People Problems

Experience is what makes you pause briefly before going ahead and making the same mistake.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Mistakes Problems Situations Time

Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.

(1939 – ) comedian, actress, writer & producer
Life Problems

No job is too small to botch.

Failure Murphy’s Laws

Any technical problem can be overcome given enough time and money.

Lerman's Corollary: You are never given enough time or money.

Money Murphy’s Laws Problems Time

Success is a public affair; failure is a private funeral.

(1907 – 1976) American actress
Failure Success

The mistakes made by Congress wouldn't be so bad if the next Congress didn't keep trying to correct them.

(1923 – ) American quote & quip writer
Congress Government Mistakes Problems

If you think the problem is bad now, just wait until we've solved it.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

If anything just cannot go wrong, it will anyway.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Activities Marriage Problems Shopping Wives

A computer makes as many mistakes in two seconds as 20 men working 20 years.

Computers Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Things Time

When life gives you lemons, just say ‘Fuck the lemons’ and bail.

(1969 - ) American actor, comedian, & screenwriter
Life Problems TV/Movie Quotes

Dilemma: A politician trying to save both his faces at once.

Definitions Politicians Problems

A dropped object will fall with an acceleration of 32 feet per second per second, and if it is your wallet, it will make every effort to land in a public toilet.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Accidents Murphy’s Laws Problems

Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents’ shortcomings.

(1919 – 1990) educator & writer
Failure Family

When the inventor of the drawing board messed things up, what did he go back to?

(1928 – 2003) English entertainer
Mistakes Things

It's hard to describe what it's like to see a stock car flying through the air knowing it's going to land on top of you.

American auto racer
Accidents Auto racing Problems Sports

When you are in it up to your ears, keep your mouth shut.

Problems Situations

Fortune knocks but once, but misfortune has much more patience.

(1919 – 1990) educator & writer
Money Problems

If you put a spoonful of wine in a barrel full of sewage, you get sewage. If you put a spoonful of sewage in a barrel full of wine, you get sewage.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

Murphy’s Law only fails when you try to demonstrate it.


Failure Murphy’s Laws