Subject: Reviews/Criticism (Page 26)

Those who cannot remember history are doomed to learn it from Oliver Stone movies.

(1954–2007) Canadian film critic
Reviews/Criticism

The Detroit String Quartet played Brahms last night… Brahms lost.

(1898 – 1971) American humorist
Music Reviews/Criticism

Even a 14-year-old — maybe especially a 14-year-old — knows lameness when he sees it.

American television critic
Reviews/Criticism

Hayden Christensen is less Anakin, more mannequin.

English journalist
Reviews/Criticism

The movie has been signed by Michael Bay. This is the same man who directed The Rock in 1996. Now he has made Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. Faust made a better deal.

(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism

She plunged into a sea of platitudes, and with the powerful breast stroke of a channel swimmer, made her confident way towards the white cliffs of the obvious.

(1874 – 1965) English dramatist & novelist
Communication Reading/Writing Reviews/Criticism

The surprising thing about this paper is that a man who could write it would.

(1885 – 1977) English mathematician
Reading/Writing Reviews/Criticism

For me, there was a perverse masochistic pleasure in enduring the damn thing all over again, just to remind myself how cross it made me the first time round.

(1963 – ) English musician & film critic
Reviews/Criticism

Dragging your boyfriend/husband to this movie will give him the leverage to demand multiple screenings of Jerry Bruckheimer films as penance. Ladies, you have been warned.

writer, editor & film reviewer
Reviews/Criticism

Hook and Ladder is the sort of play that gives failures a bad name.

(1913 – 1996) writer & Broadway theater critic
Reviews/Criticism

Just as long as the real thing and twice as noisy.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Reviews/Criticism

Gone in 60 Seconds seems to be trying hard.

movie writer, reviewer & columnist
Reviews/Criticism

Sun Tzu believed that becoming predictable would lead to disaster. Apparently, the creators of The Art of War couldn’t be bothered to take him to heart.

writer, editor & film reviewer
Reviews/Criticism

Apparently the understudy had to go because of her throat; I suppose someone threatened to cut it.

(1865-1940) English actress
Acting Entertainment Insults Reviews/Criticism

I came away impressed with the mutant power of director Brett Ratner. We should strategically deploy him to destroy runaway movie franchises that threaten mankind with their continued existence.

American film critic
Reviews/Criticism

The play holds the season’s record, thus far, with a run of four evening performances and one matinée… by an odd coincidence, it ran just five performances too many.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Reviews/Criticism

I’d rather spend my 180 minutes seeing how hard a 400-pound gorilla can tighten a vise around my penis before I pass out from the pain.

(movie reviews at mrcranky.com)
Reviews/Criticism

Battlefield Earth is like taking a bus trip with someone who has needed a bath for a long time. It's not merely bad; it's unpleasant in a hostile way.

(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism

He played the king as if afraid someone else would play the ace.

(1900 – 1969) American drama critic & author
Acting Reviews/Criticism

The battle was lost several movies earlier.

musician & film reviewer
Reviews/Criticism

Two hours of looking up at Marlon Brando's butt cheeks squashed flat against a glass tabletop would have been a preferable to this werewolf masterpiece.

(movie reviews at mrcranky.com)
Reviews/Criticism