Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Reviews/Criticism
(Page 4)
It [
Heaven’s Gate
] fails so completely that you might suspect Michael Cimino sold his soul to the Devil to obtain the success of the
Deer Hunter,
and the Devil has just come around to collect.
Vincent Canby
(1924 – 2000) American film critic
Reviews/Criticism
"Heaven’s Gate"
This is a woman who thinks the Spanish Inquisition was just tough love for heretics.
Kelsey Grammer
(1955 – ) American actor, comedian, producer, director & singer
Reviews/Criticism
TV/Movie Quotes
As Frasier Crane in “Frasier”
Caligula
is sickening, utterly worthless, shameful trash. If it is not the worst film I have ever seen, that makes it all the more shameful.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“Caligula”
It's like watching the travel video of the most annoying guy you know.
Brian Tallerico
film reviewer
Reviews/Criticism
“Charlie Countryman”
It not only promotes every stereotype and invokes every cliché of Brooklyn lore, it combines them all into an insulting composite, fuses that to the chrome-and-fins of the pointless Fifties, and then – weirdly – pretends it’s Shakespeare.
Jack Mathews
film critic
Reviews/Criticism
Reviewing the film “Deuces Wild”
I don't remember it being like this when I did the Roman Empire at school.
Sam Wollaston
television critic
Reviews/Criticism
Rome
Being called a slut by Rush Limbaugh is like being called a slut by an obese drug addict.
Andy Borowitz
(1958 – ) American writer, comedian, satirist & actor
Reviews/Criticism
Rush Limbaugh
A lady… with all the poise of the Sphinx though but little of her mystery.
Dorothy Parker
(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Reviews/Criticism
Literary diarrhea.
Noel Coward
(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Insults
Reviews/Criticism
Of writer Gertrude Stein
There are two ways of disliking poetry; one way is to dislike it, the other is to read Pope.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Communication
Reading/Writing
Reviews/Criticism
About Alexander Pope
Poetry
Here's where we we get out the thesaurus and look up synonyms for "garbage."
Mike LaSalle
entertainment critic
Reviews/Criticism
“Shanghai Knights”
You can actually hear the writers pulling ideas out of their butts and flinging them willy-nilly at the screen.
Rob Vaux
writer, editor & film reviewer
Reviews/Criticism
“Night at the Museum 2: Battle of the Smithsonian”
It’s like having an orange popcicle, the mild orange taste is pleasing enough, but no one ever spends much time thinking about it afterwards, it’s banished from our thoughts because while the taste is good, it’s also unremarkable.
The Movie Guys
(movie reviews at themovieguys.net)
Reviews/Criticism
“The Big Wedding”
We are living here on a planet in shambles, terrorists running murderously amok, the Mideast on the verge of exploding, humanity plagued by hateful prejudices that go back centuries, poverty and depravity rampant, and when God decides to intervene, it’s to straighten out a few troubled folks in a small town and solve a murder case?
Tom Shone
British film critic & writer
Reviews/Criticism
“Joan of Arcadia"
The dialogue was it’s only strong area, but liking the film because of that would be akin to thinking a park bench a good snack because someone spilled your favorite espresso on it.
The Movie Guys
(movie reviews at themovieguys.net)
Reviews/Criticism
“Olympus Has Fallen”
John Waters’
Pink Flamingos
has been restored for its 25th anniversary revival, and with any luck at all that means I won’t have to see it again for another 25 years. If I haven’t retired by then, I will.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“Pink Flamingos”
Which is he playing now?
W. Somerset Maugham
(1874 – 1965) English dramatist & novelist
Reviews/Criticism
Watching Spencer Tracy on the set of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde
Many TV programs suck, but none has ever sucked with such eye-popping abandon as this one.
Colin Murphy
Irish reviewer
Reviews/Criticism
“Winning Streak”
Fool! Dost thou not know that creepy children have cursed our screens in numbers too great to count, and by now, we find them marginally less terrifying than navel lint?
Rob Vaux
writer, editor & film reviewer
Reviews/Criticism
“The Reaping”
I’m glad it wasn’t that bad.
MIchael Dance
film critic
Reviews/Criticism
“Twilight”
If
Airplane!
was
Mad Magazine
at its absolute best, a real genius work of insanity,
Scary Movie 5
is an issue you don’t bother trying to get back after the teacher confiscates it.
Devin Faraci
film critic
Reviews/Criticism
“Scary Movie 5”
Page 4 of 28
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