Subject: Science/Weather (Page 2)

Winter is nature’s way of saying, “Up yours.”

(1930 – ) American author and billiard player, teacher & commentator
Science/Weather

I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

Language Science/Weather

It is hard for the ape to believe that he has descended from man.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Animals People Science/Weather

What goes up must come down… but don't expect it to come down where you can find it.

(1939 – ) comedian, actress, writer & producer
Science/Weather

I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Places Science/Weather

Sleet: A slipcover.

Definitions Science/Weather

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.

Characteristics Honesty Lies Science/Weather

In the school I went to, they asked a kid to prove the law of gravity and he threw the teacher out of the window.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Education School Science/Weather

The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.

(1934 – ) writer & editor
Intelligence People Places Science/Weather Stupidity

Bodies in motion tend to remain in motion; bodies at rest tend to remain in bed.

Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

The attention span of a computer is only as long as its electrical cord.

Computers Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Things

Facts are stubborn things, but statistics are more pliable.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Beliefs Characteristics Facts Science/Weather

Science is Truth. Don't be misled by fact.

Beliefs Facts Honesty Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Truth

I went to Moscow once; it was so cold at night one guy fell out of bed and broke his pajamas.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Cold Places Science/Weather

The trouble with weather forecasting is that it's right too often for us to ignore it and wrong too often for us to rely on it.

American entrepreneur
Science/Weather

It is easier to square the circle than to get round a mathematician.

(1806 – 1871) English mathematician
Occupations Science/Weather Work

How fast does a zebra have to run before it looks grey?

(1973 – ) American comedian
Animals Science/Weather

No matter how rich you become, how famous or powerful, when you die the size of your funeral will still pretty much depend on the weather.

comedian, counselor & speaker
Death Science/Weather Success Wealth

Why are the pictures square if the lens is round?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Science/Weather

If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?

(1908 – 2002) comedian, radio & television actor
Body Mothers Science/Weather

The rain is coming down like gangbusters!

Mixed metaphors Science/Weather