Subject: Science/Weather (Page 5)

A weed is a plant that has mastered every survival skill except for learning how to grow in rows.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Science/Weather

Sleet: A slipcover.

Definitions Science/Weather

I have the oldest typewriter in the world; it types in pencil.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Science/Weather Things

We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming.

(1912 – 1977) German-born rocket engineer
Science/Weather

In India, ‘cold weather’ is merely a conventional phrase and has come into use through the necessity of having some way to distinguish between weather which will melt a brass door knob and weather which only makes it mushy.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Heat Science/Weather

If Beethoven had been killed in a plane crash at the age of 22, it would have changed the history of music… and of aviation.

(1937 – ) British playwright & screenwriter
Entertainment Music Science/Weather

It's like I disprove evolution and intelligent design at once.

(1978 – ) American comic writer
Appearance Body People Science/Weather Self

It is so hot… the birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

I’d like the window that says “Are you sure you want to do this? “OK/Cancel” to pop up less often on my computer and more in my real life.

Life Science/Weather

Nothing puzzles me more than time and space; and yet nothing troubles me less, as I never think about them.

(1775 – 1834) English critic & essayist
Characteristics Science/Weather Time

You know it is summer in Ireland when the rain gets warmer.

(1892 – 1992) American film & television producer & director
Places Science/Weather

Men and women belong to different species, and communication between them is a science still in its infancy.

(1937 – ) comedian & television actor
Communication Men People Science/Weather Women

Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only more intelligent.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Animals Cold Football Intelligence Places Sports

My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them.

(1955 – ) magician & showman
Science/Weather

Every program has at least one bug and can be shortened by at least one instruction — from which, by induction, one can deduce that every program can be reduced to one instruction which doesn't work.

Computers Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Things

Last night, it was so cold, the flashers in New York were only describing themselves.

(1925 – 2005) television host
Cold New York City Places Science/Weather Situations

Playing in this nice weather really makes me remember all the times I got stung by a bee.

(1936 – ) American football coach & television announcer
Misspokements Science/Weather

He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts… for support rather than illumination.

(1844 – 1912) Scottish poet, novelist & literary critic
Communication Intelligence Science/Weather

Bad weather always looks worse through a window.

(1928 – ) humorist, singer, songwriter & satirist
Science/Weather

Well, evolution’s just a “theory;”  and, I’m thinking to myself, ‘Well, thank goodness gravity’s a law.'

(1963 – ) American stand-up comedian
Science/Weather

Computing power increases as the square of the cost; if you want to do it twice as cheaply, you have to do it four times slower.

Computers Money Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Situations Things