Subject: Science/Weather (Page 9)

It ain’t the heat; it’s the humility.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Heat Malaprops Science/Weather Yogi-isms

Calculus: The branch of mathematics that is so scary it causes everybody to stop studying mathematics.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Definitions Science/Weather

We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming.

(1912 – 1977) German-born rocket engineer
Science/Weather

Chance of Rain Today Depends On Where You LIve

Headlines Science/Weather

Equations are the devil’s sentences.

(1964 – ) comedian, political satirist, writer & television host
Science/Weather

I’d like the window that says “Are you sure you want to do this? “OK/Cancel” to pop up less often on my computer and more in my real life.

Life Science/Weather

How does Teflon stick to the pan?

Science/Weather

For a list of all the ways technology has failed to improve the quality of life, please press 3.

(1943 – 2004) author & psychologist
Science/Weather

It was so hot in Beverly Hills, people were frying egg whites on the sidewalk.

American comedian
Heat Science/Weather

Rare is the “improvement” that will ever repay the time lost in performing it.

Computers Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Things

It is so hot… I saw a dog chasing a cat and they were both walking.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

It's hotter than the hinges on the gates of hell.

Expressions Heat Science/Weather

Ever notice how random chance always picks you for jury duty, but not to win the lottery?

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Science/Weather Situations

It was so cold… flashers were just describing themselves.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

It was so cold… I chipped a tooth on my soup.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

Love is a matter of chemistry; sex is a matter of physics.

Emotions Love Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

Psychology: The science that tells you what you already know in words you can’t understand.

Definitions Science/Weather

I don’t know why I should have to learn Algebra… I’m never likely to go there.

(1942 – ) Scottish comedian, musician & actor
Places Science/Weather

It is so hot… I saw a squirrel fanning his nuts.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

Geography is just physics slowed down, with a couple of trees stuck in it.

(1948 – ) English novelist
Science/Weather

Remember folks, stop lights timed for 35 mph are also timed for 70 mph.

(1948 – 1990) comedian
Autos Science/Weather Things