Subject: Science/Weather (Page 9)

It is so hot… the trees are whistling for the dogs.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

Bad weather reports are more often right than good ones.

Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra; in real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Education Learning Life Science/Weather

Science: An orderly arrangement of what, at the moment, seems to be the facts.

Beliefs Definitions Facts Science/Weather

Plenty of people believe in energy conservation – mainly their own.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Science/Weather

The church has historically been very slow to embrace technology; until very recently, their idea of a laptop was an altar boy.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Beliefs People Religion Science/Weather

I have the oldest typewriter in the world; it types in pencil.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Science/Weather Things

Fifty percent of people have a below-average understanding of statistics.

People Science/Weather

If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.

(1919 – 1991) American comedian & actor
Science/Weather

It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one’s hat keeps blowing off.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Clothing Science/Weather

Theology is the effort to explain the unknowable in terms of the not worth knowing.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Beliefs Religion Science/Weather

The first principle is that you must not fool yourself… and you are the easiest person to fool.

(1918 – 1988) American physicist
People Science/Weather Self

The remaining distance to your chosen campsite remains constant as twilight approaches.

Activities Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

It would appear that we have reached the limits of what it is possible to achieve with computer technology, although one should be careful with such statements, as they tend to sound pretty silly in 5 years.

(1903 – 1957) Hungarian-American mathematician
Computers Future Science/Weather Things Time

There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all.

(1927 – ) magician & comedy writer
Science/Weather Situations

It is so hot… the cows arre giving evaporated milk.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

OK, so what’s the speed of dark?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Science/Weather

Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Science/Weather

In mathematics you don't understand things… you just get used to them.

(1903 – 1957) Hungarian-American mathematician
Intelligence Science/Weather Understanding

When the ducks are walking, you know it is too windy to be playing golf.

American professional golfer
Golf Science/Weather Sports

The reason lightning doesn't strike twice in the same place is that the same place isn’t there the second time.

(1940 – ) American ventriloquist, comedian & actor
Science/Weather