Subject: Sex (Page 12)

They are a either a pain in the backside or too drunk to perform.

Amsterdam prostitutes’ spokeswoman
Sex Sports

If you use the electric vibrator near water, you may come and go at the same time.


Sex Things

The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Death People Self Sex

Self-abuse is the sincerest kind.

David Gerrold (1944 – ) science fiction author
Activities Self Sex

Of course a platonic relationship is possible, but only between husband and wife.


Marriage Relationships Sex

I know I’m not sexy; in high school I was voted “Most Likely to Masturbate.”

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Sex

My vagina is like Newark [New Jersey]; men know it’s there, but they don’t want to visit.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Self Sex

After making love I said to my girl, "Was it good for you?… and she said, "I don't think that was good for anybody.

(1949 – 2016) American comedian & television actor
Sex

Images You Should Not Masturbate To

Book Titles Sex

When you don’t have any money, the problem is food; when you have money, it’s sex; when you have both, it’s health.

(1926 – ) Irish American novelist & playwright
Health Money Sex

Nothing risqué nothing gained!

(1933 – 1967) American actress, entertainer & Hollywood sex symbol
Communication Sex Wordplay

The only way to prevent prostitution altogether would be to imprison one half of the human race.

(1886 – 1961) Canadian writer, literary critic & libertarian philosopher
Sex

A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Men Mistakes People Sex Women

Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Fights Sex

The average man thinks about sex every… what were we talking about?

(1964 – ) American comedian
Men People Sex

I just want what every married woman wants, someone besides her husband to sleep with.

(1954 – ) American actress & singer-songwriter
Sex TV/Movie Quotes Women

In the middle of an asthma attack she got an obscene phone call; the guy said, “Did I call you or did you call me?”

comedian
Health Sex

Programming is like sex: one mistake and you’re providing support for a lifetime.


Computers Sex Things

Sex alleviates tension; love causes it.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Emotions Love Sex

The difference between a whore and a congressman is that a congressman makes more money.

(1927 – 1989) author, essayist & environmentalist
Congress Government Sex

Sex is nobody's business except the three people involved.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
People Sex