Subject: Signs (Page 61)

Swift, courteous self-service

Walkin's Welcome

Condoms & Lubricants – Make Dad’s Day

Lets keep the Tea – Dump The Polititions [sic]

God Shows No Favoritism, But Our Sign Guy Does – Go Cubs!

Open seven days a week and weekends.

Fragile. Do not drop.

Warning – Please Look Under Your Vehicle for Penguins

Bigass Beer

QUIT 5T3AL!NG O R LETT3R$

Please Do Not Pee on Ladies or Gentlemen

Real Men Work Here! – See the Mess

Over the massive front doors of a church, these words were inscribed: "The Gates of Heaven."

Below that was a small cardboard sign which read: "Please use other entrance."

Cherry Poppers

I Want It All and I Want It Delivered

Frisky Business

Coca-Cora

Don't Wait For the Hearse to Take You to Church

SOCCER NOT ALLOWED – Soccer May Only Be Played in Archery Range

Caution! Contents hot!