Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Signs
(Page 79)
Drop Your Pants Here and You Will Receive Prompt Attention
Sign
Signs
At a dry cleaners
It will take about 1 minute to fix a hot drink. Please wail.
Translation
Signs
Translations
Warning: This product can burn eyes.
Label
Signs
From a curling iron
Welcome To – Arkansas – The Natural State – Home of President Bill Clinton In Compliance With Megan’s Law, The Above is a Known Sex Offender
Sign
Signs
Last line added underneath
NO SWIMMING IN THIS AREA
Sign
Signs
In the middle of a field containing no water at a national park
UFO UNIVERSITY
Sign
Signs
On a building
Sorry, We are CLOSED Due to Short Staff
and posted underneath
Hire taller staff cause I need a taco!
Sign
Signs
TATTOOS – For Lease – Starting at $7.00 sq. ft.
Sign
Signs
Do Not Stand On the Turtle
Sign
Signs
Near a zoo turtle statue
With Xhilaration® There are No Rules. Whether you choose to go crazy or dress to thrill. Make a statement. Make a scene. Wear what you want and it won’t be wrong.
Label
Signs
Tag on clothing for 18-month-old girls
Life’s a Cabernet
Business name
Signs
Wine shop in Chicago
Ingredients: Artificially bleached flour, sugar, vegetable fat, yeast, salt, gluten, soya flour, emulsifier 472 (E) & 481, flour treatment agents, enzymes, water. May contain: fruit.
Label of ingredients
Signs
The ingredients list on a package of fruit buns
Zombie Invasion!!! Run!!!
On a portable lighted highway sign
Signs
The VERY DARK CAVES – “It’s Almost Like Being Blind!”
Sign
Signs
At entrance to caves
Money In the Tank – M&M Portolets
Sign
Signs
Visitors: HUSBANDS ONLY. ONE PER BED.
Sign
Signs
At a hospital
These ear plugs are nontoxic, but may interfere with breathing if caught in windpipe
Label
Signs
On earplugs
Running low on faith? Stop in for a fill-up.
Church sign
Signs
Outside a church
Get Government Out of Medecine [sic]
Protest sign
Signs
Leave These Lights On At All Times – Auth. Police Department
Turn Lights Off
Sign
Signs
Above and below a light switch
If you’re going to steal, then smile for the camera.
Sign
Signs
In a store
Page 79 of 96
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