Football | Just-One-Liners.com

Subject: Sports » Football

Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season… one word and one word only – Super Bowl.

Bill Peterson

football coach

Hold when you're at home and don't hold when you're on the road.

John McKay

(1923 – 2001) American football coach

Football Sports On his team's blocking strategy

The New York Jets have been given permission to sell Girl Scout Cookies.

David Letterman

(1947 – ) comedian & television host

Football After 12 NFL teams were told they had permission to sell Super Bowl Tickets after the end of the regular season

We didn't tackle well today but we made up for it by not blocking.

John McKay

(1923 – 2001) American football coach

Football Sports

The older you get, the faster you ran as a kid.

Steve Owen

professional football player & coach

Age Football Memory Sports Running

I don't speak German, he don't speak English, and I think I just agreed to marry his daughter.

Jeff Hammerschmidt

American football player & coach

Communication Football Language Sports After talking to the mayor of Fischback Germany

If you lose your best cornerback and punter, I’d say that’s a double loss.

John Madden

(1936 – ) American football coach & television announcer

Football Misspokements Sports

I'm all in favor of it.

John McKay

(1923 – 2001) American football coach

Football Sports Responding to a question about his team's execution

There's nothing that cleanses your soul like getting the hell kicked out of you.

Woody Hayes

college football coach

Football Sports Losing

Now that Im retired, I want to say that all defensive linemen are sissies.

Dan Fouts

American football player

Football Sports Defensive linemen

Every time I look up, it seems we're punting.

John McKay

(1923 – 2001) American football coach

Football Sports On the Tampa Bay Buccaneers’ early games

Kickers are like horse manure. They're all over the place.

John McKay

(1923 – 2001) American football coach

Football Sports Kickers

One thing I've learned over the years is sometimes if you make kicks early in the game, you don't have to make them late.

Gary Anderson

American football kicker

Football Sports Kicking

If he wanted me to run 26 miles through the hills, I would. If he wanted me to carry water bottles, I would. If he wanted me to get my hair cut like his… well, you have to draw the line somewhere.

'Babe' Laufenberg

American football player

Football Sports On coach Jimmy Johnson's hair

They say losing builds character. I have all the character I need.

Ray Malvasi

American football coach

Football Sports Character

They were absolutely horrible and that’s the best thing I can say. Besides that they were bad.

John McKay

(1923 – 2001) American football coach

Football Sports On his team’s poor play

Being in politics is like being a football coach; you have to be smart enough to understand the game, and be dumb enough to think it’s important.

Eugene McCarthy

(1916 – 2005) American politician & poet

Football Government Politics Sports Coaching

University: A modern school where football is taught.

Ambrose Bierce

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Communication Definitions Education Football Language School University

Football isn’t a contact sport, it’s a collision sport; dancing is a contact sport.

‘Duffy’ Daugherty

(1915 – 1987) American football player and coach

Dance Football Sports

If it was, Army and Navy would play for the national championship every year.

Bobby Bowden

college football coach

Football Sports When asked if tough discipline produces winning teams

I had pro offers from the Detroit Lions and Green Bay Packers, who were pretty hard up for linemen in those days. If I had gone into professional football the name Jerry Ford might have been a household word today.

Gerald Ford

(1913 – 2006) 36th U.S. president

Football Sports

Quotes and One Liners

humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more

Categories

Additional Categories

Oops...

Some Popular Authors

Subject: Sports » Football

Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season… one word and one word only – Super Bowl.

Hold when you're at home and don't hold when you're on the road.

The New York Jets have been given permission to sell Girl Scout Cookies.

We didn't tackle well today but we made up for it by not blocking.

The older you get, the faster you ran as a kid.

I don't speak German, he don't speak English, and I think I just agreed to marry his daughter.

If you lose your best cornerback and punter, I’d say that’s a double loss.

I'm all in favor of it.

There's nothing that cleanses your soul like getting the hell kicked out of you.

Now that Im retired, I want to say that all defensive linemen are sissies.

Every time I look up, it seems we're punting.

Kickers are like horse manure. They're all over the place.

One thing I've learned over the years is sometimes if you make kicks early in the game, you don't have to make them late.

If he wanted me to run 26 miles through the hills, I would. If he wanted me to carry water bottles, I would. If he wanted me to get my hair cut like his… well, you have to draw the line somewhere.

They say losing builds character. I have all the character I need.

They were absolutely horrible and that’s the best thing I can say. Besides that they were bad.

Being in politics is like being a football coach; you have to be smart enough to understand the game, and be dumb enough to think it’s important.

University: A modern school where football is taught.

Football isn’t a contact sport, it’s a collision sport; dancing is a contact sport.

If it was, Army and Navy would play for the national championship every year.

I had pro offers from the Detroit Lions and Green Bay Packers, who were pretty hard up for linemen in those days. If I had gone into professional football the name Jerry Ford might have been a household word today.