Subject: Sports » Golf

That putt had more breaks than a government job.

golf writer
Golf Sports

Golf: A game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill adapted for the purpose

(1856 – 1924) 28th U.S. president & politician
Golf Sports

The trees taunt you; the sand mocks you; the water calls your name… and they say golf is a quiet game.

Golf Sports

The only way of really finding out a man's true character is to play golf with him; in no other walk of life does the cloven hoof so quickly display itself.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Characteristics Golf Sports

As if we don’t have enough violence on television.

(1925 – 2018) U.S. first lady, wife of George H. W. Bush
Golf Sports

If you could eliminate the occasional bad shot you would be the first person to do so.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Stroke: Any forward movement of the golf club that is made with the intention of hitting and moving the ball and is observed by another golfer.

Definitions Golf Sports

He has the touch of a gay hairdresser.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child; just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five.

(1932 – 2009) author, poet & critic
Golf Honesty Insults Intelligence Sports

When I ask you what club to use, look the other way and don't answer.

(1912 – 2002) professional golfer
Golf Sports

A woman I know is engaged to a real golf nut.  They are supposed to get married next Saturday…but only if it rains.

Golf Marriage Sports

They christened their game ‘golf’ because they were Scottish and reveled in meaningless Celtic noises in the back of the throat.

(1957 – ) English actor, writer, journalist, comedian & film director
Golf Places Sports

I think Jessel’s philosophy about golf was something like: If all you’re going to do is chase the ball, why hit it in the first place?

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Golf Sports

No matter how bad you are playing, it is always possible to play worse.

Golf Murphy’s Laws Sports

Obviously a deer on the fairway has seen you tee off before and knows that the safest place to be when you play is right down the middle.

(1916 – 1987) television actor & comedian
Golf Sports

Go ahead and putt, you are not interrupting my conversation. 


Golf Sports

Some players would complain if they had to play on Dolly Parton's bedspread.

(1910 – 1983) professional golfer
Golf Sports

Never bet with anyone you meet on the first tee who has a deep suntan, a 1-iron in his bag, and squinty eyes.

professional golfer
Golf Sports

I don’t like to watch golf on television because I can’t stand people who whisper.

(1936 – 2014) American standup comedian, actor & author
Golf Speech Sports Television

That son of a bitch was able to hole a putt over sixty feet of peanut brittle.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

I went to play golf and tried to shoot my age, but I shot my weight instead.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Age Fat Golf Sports