Golf | Just-One-Liners.com

Subject: Sports » Golf (Page 17)

Golf is like love. One day you think you are too old and the next day you want to do it again.

Roberto de Vicenzo

Argentinian professional golfer

Golf Sports

One lesson you better learn if you want to be in politics is that you never go out on a golf course and beat the President.

Lyndon Johnson

(1908 – 1973) 36th U.S. president

Golf Government Politics President Sports

I'm working as hard as I can to get my life and my cash to run out at the same time. If I can just die after lunch Tuesday, everything would be perfect.

Doug Sanders

(1933 – ) American professional golfer

Golf Money Sports

I spent $3 million on drink and $3 million on gambling, but I wasted the rest.

John Daly

professional golfer

Golf Sports

Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens.

Bob Hope

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor

Age Golf Sports

Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five.

John Updike

(1932 – 2009) author, poet & critic

Golf Sports

The people who gave us golf and called it a game are the same people who gave us bag pipes and called it music.

Silk Stockings TV Show

Entertainment Golf Music Sports Bagpipes

As if we don’t have enough violence on television.

Barbara Bush

(1925 – 2018) U.S. first lady, wife of George H. W. Bush

Golf Sports On husband George accidentally hitting two spectators with golf balls

Your financial cost can best be figured out when you realize that if you were to devote the same time and energy to business instead of golf, you would be a millionaire in approximately six weeks.

Buddy Hackett

(1924 – 2003) American comedian & actor

Golf Sports

You can talk to a fade but a hook won’t listen.

Lee Trevino

(1942 – ) American professional golfer

Golf Sports

Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft; today it’s called golf.

Will Rogers

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator

Golf Sports Witchcraft

Give me a man with big hands and big feet and no brains and I'll make a golfer out of him.

Walter Hagen

American professional golfer

Golf Sports

A well-adjusted man is one who can play golf as if it were a game.

Anonymous

Golf Sports

The trees taunt you; the sand mocks you; the water calls your name… and they say golf is a quiet game.

Anonymous

Golf Sports

Some people say I play erratic golf. What they mean is I frequently play lousy.

Tom Shaw

American professional golfer

Golf Sports

One hundred years of experience has demonstrated that the game is temporary insanity practiced in a pasture.

Dave Kindred

American sports journalist

Golf Sports

Never break your putter and your driver in the same round or you're dead.

Tommy Bolt

(1916 – 2008) American professional golfer

Golf Sports

The main problem with keeping your eye on the ball is you have to take your eye off your opponent.

Bruce Lansky

(1941 – ) poet, author, editor & anthologist

Golf Sports Opponents

[The ball] came out like a dead mouse from a cornfield.

David Feherty

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator

Golf Sports After a shot from the rough

I tried real hard to play golf, and I was so bad at it they would have to check me for ticks at the end of the round because I’d spent about half the day in the woods.

Jeff Foxworthy

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

Golf Sports Ticks

There are two things that won’t last long in this world – dogs that chase cars and pros that putt for pars.

Lee Trevino

(1942 – ) American professional golfer

Golf Sports

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Subject: Sports » Golf (Page 17)

Golf is like love. One day you think you are too old and the next day you want to do it again.

One lesson you better learn if you want to be in politics is that you never go out on a golf course and beat the President.

I'm working as hard as I can to get my life and my cash to run out at the same time. If I can just die after lunch Tuesday, everything would be perfect.

I spent $3 million on drink and $3 million on gambling, but I wasted the rest.

Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens.

Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five.

The people who gave us golf and called it a game are the same people who gave us bag pipes and called it music.

As if we don’t have enough violence on television.

Your financial cost can best be figured out when you realize that if you were to devote the same time and energy to business instead of golf, you would be a millionaire in approximately six weeks.

You can talk to a fade but a hook won’t listen.

Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft; today it’s called golf.

Give me a man with big hands and big feet and no brains and I'll make a golfer out of him.

A well-adjusted man is one who can play golf as if it were a game.

The trees taunt you; the sand mocks you; the water calls your name… and they say golf is a quiet game.

Some people say I play erratic golf. What they mean is I frequently play lousy.

One hundred years of experience has demonstrated that the game is temporary insanity practiced in a pasture.

Never break your putter and your driver in the same round or you're dead.

The main problem with keeping your eye on the ball is you have to take your eye off your opponent.

[The ball] came out like a dead mouse from a cornfield.

I tried real hard to play golf, and I was so bad at it they would have to check me for ticks at the end of the round because I’d spent about half the day in the woods.

There are two things that won’t last long in this world – dogs that chase cars and pros that putt for pars.