Subject: Sports » Golf (Page 18)

Golf is like chasing a quinine pill around a cow pasture.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Activities Golf Sports

Someone once told me that there is more to life than golf… I think it was my ex-wife.

(1941 – ) poet, author, editor & anthologist
Golf Sports

When I ask you what club to use, look the other way and don't answer.

(1912 – 2002) professional golfer
Golf Sports

It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven being good at billiards or golf.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Activities Golf Sports

Why am I using a new putter? Because the old one didn’t float too well.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Win and you are the superior being in all the universe; lose, and may the fleas of a million rodents, infect your every orifice.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

You don’t know what pressure is until you play for five bucks with only two in your pocket.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

I wouldn't trust him to sit on a toilet the right way.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

Nothing goes down slower than a golf handicap.

professional golfer
Golf Sports

Golf is the loneliest of games, not excluding postal chess.

golf writer
Golf Sports

A good one iron shot is about as easy to come by as an understanding wife.

(1929 – ) American author & sportswriter
Golf Sports

Never break your putter and your driver in the same round or you're dead.

(1916 – 2008) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

There are two things you can do with your head down– play golf and pray.

(1935 – ) Puerto Rican professional golfer
Golf Sports

This one'll slide down the hill like a greased piglet.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

If you pick up a golfer and hold it close to your ear, like a conch shell, and listen, you will hear an alibi.

Golf Sports

It takes longer to learn to be a good golfer than it does to become a brain surgeon. On the other hand, you don't get to ride around on a cart, drink beer, eat hot dogs and stare at the cart girl's tits all day if you are performing brain surgery.

Golf Occupations Sports Work

Golf is the only game in which a precise knowledge of the rules can earn one a reputation for bad sportsmanship.

Irish journalist & author
Golf Sports

I was three over, one over a house, one over a patio, and one over a swimming pool.

(1953 – ) American baseball player
Golf Sports

A business executive is someone who talks golf in the office and business on the golf course!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Golf People Sports

Golf, especially championship golf, isn't supposed to be fun, was never meant to be fair, and never will make any sense.

author
Golf Sports

To find a man’s true character, play golf with him.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Characteristics Golf Sports