Subject: Sports » Golf (Page 2)

Congress

(1908 – 1973) 36th U.S. president
Congress Golf Government Sports

Columbus went around the world in 1492; that isn't a lot of strokes when you consider the course.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

John Daly's longer than Greg Norman… he’s even longer than War and Peace.

American sports columnist
Golf Sports

[The ball] came out like a dead mouse from a cornfield.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

I don't think he'd even be happy with ice cream right now.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

A golf ball is like a clock. Always hit it at six o'clock and make it go toward twelve o'clock. But make sure you're in the same time zone.

(1935 – ) Puerto Rican professional golfer
Golf Sports

Don Quixote would understand golf. It is the impossible dream.

(1919 – 1998) American sportswriter
Golf Misspokements Sports

I went to play golf and tried to shoot my age, but I shot my weight instead.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Age Fat Golf Sports

I have never found anything, including divorce and a sexual harassment suit, more frustrating.

(1970 – ) American actor, producer & stand up comedian
Golf Sports

Gimme: An agreement between two duffer golfers who can’t putt.

Definitions Golf Sports

Handicap: An allocation of strokes on one or more holes that permits two golfers of very different ability to do equally poorly on the same course.

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Golf Sports

Tee your ball high… the air offers less resistance than dirt.

(1940 – ) professional golfer
Golf Sports

Only a stupid golfer throws his club behind him; the smart golfer throws his club ahead so he can pick it up on the way to the next hole.

Golf Sports

It's not whether you win or lose – but whether I win or lose!

professional golfer
Golf Sports

Sam Snead was born with a natural ability to keep his bar bills as low as his golf scores.

(1910 – 1983) professional golfer
Alcohol Golf Sports

If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death.


(1912 – 2002) professional golfer
Golf Sports

A golf ball is like a clock; always hit it at 6 o’clock and make it go toward 12 o’clock… but make sure you’re in the same time zone.

(1935 – ) Puerto Rican professional golfer
Golf Sports

Obviously a deer on the fairway has seen you tee off before and knows that the safest place to be when you play is right down the middle.

(1916 – 1987) television actor & comedian
Golf Sports

If you’d offered me a 69 at the start this morning I’d have been all over you.

Scottish professional golfer
Golf Misspokements Sports

Your best golf shots always occur when playing alone.

Golf Murphy’s Laws People Sports

If God wants to produce the ideal golfer then He should create a being with a set of unequal arms and likewise legs, an elbow-free left arm, knees which hinge sideways and a ribless torso from which emerges, at an angle of 45 degrees, a stretched neck fitted with one color-blind eye stuck firmly on the left side.

golf author
Golf Sports