Subject: Sports » Golf (Page 2)

Some players would complain if they had to play on Dolly Parton's bedspread.

(1910 – 1983) professional golfer
Golf Sports

Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by an occasional miracle.

Golf Sports

Obviously a deer on the fairway has seen you tee off before and knows that the safest place to be when you play is right down the middle.

(1916 – 1987) television actor & comedian
Golf Sports

Gimme:  An agreement between two losers who can't putt.

(1907 – 1987) American journalist & author
Golf Situations Sports

The older you get the stronger the wind gets… and it's always in your face.

(1940 – ) professional golfer
Golf Old Science/Weather Sports

Win and you are the superior being in all the universe; lose, and may the fleas of a million rodents, infect your every orifice.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

Golf is not so much a sport as an insult to lawns.

Golf Sports

But if you figure in the wind chill factor, it’s only 102.

professional golfer
Golf Heat Science/Weather Sports

Never putt until the cup stops moving.

(1941 – ) poet, author, editor & anthologist
Golf Sports

Fairway: A narrow strip of closely mown grass that separates two groups of golfers looking for lost balls in the rough.

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Golf Sports

I don't have anywhere to put my elbows when I putt now.

professional golfer
Golf Sports

This one'll slide down the hill like a greased piglet.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

In golf, humiliations are the essence of the game.

(1908 – 2004) British/American journalist, television personality & broadcaster
Golf Sports

Golf is more fun than walking naked in a strange place… but not much.

(1924 – 2003) American comedian & actor
Golf Sports

When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either hit one more club or two more balls.

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Golf Sports

Golf isn’t a game, it’s a choice that one makes with one’s life.

screenwriter & producer
Golf Sports

For most amateurs, the best wood in the bag… the pencil!

(1935 – ) Puerto Rican professional golfer
Golf Sports

The trees taunt you; the sand mocks you; the water calls your name… and they say golf is a quiet game.

Golf Sports

If you really want to get better at golf, go back and take it up at a much earlier age.

Anglo-Irish golfer
Golf Sports

Sam Snead was born with a natural ability to keep his bar bills as low as his golf scores.

(1910 – 1983) professional golfer
Alcohol Golf Sports

I'll always remember the day I broke ninety. I had a few beers in the clubhouse and was so excited I forgot to play the back nine.

(1941 – ) poet, author, editor & anthologist
Golf Sports