Subject: Sports » Golf (Page 5)

Man blames fate for other accidents but feels personally responsible for a hole-in-one.

Golf Situations Sports

While playing golf today I hit two good balls… I stepped on a rake.

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Golf Sports

Bogey: The number of strokes needed to finish a hole by a golfer of average skill and above-average honesty.

Definitions Golf Sports

Chip Shot: A short, low approach shot that gets a player into position for one or more missed puts.

Definitions Golf Sports

This is a game of misses; the guy who misses the best is going to win.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

The people who gave us golf and called it a game are the same people who gave us bag pipes and called it music.

Entertainment Golf Music Sports

Golf is essentially an exercise in masochism conducted out of doors.

Golf Sports

Yeah, after each of my downhill putts.

professional golfer
Golf Sports

If you’re caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron; not even God can hit a 1-iron.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
God Golf Sports

I've thrown or broken a few clubs in my day. In fact, I guess at one time or another I probably held distance records for every club in the bag.

(1916 – 2008) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

I wouldn't say God couldn't have got out of it, but he'd have had to throw it.

(1929 – 2016) American golfer
Golf Sports

You never had to ask his score; just count the casualties.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Golf Sports

Always keep in mind that if God didn't want a man to have mulligans, golf balls wouldn't come three to a sleeve.

(1929 – ) American author & sportswriter
Golf Sports

The Royal Hong Kong Club caddies hit the nail on the head; their term for golf – "Hittee ball, say damn."

Golf Sports

One of the advantages bowling has over golf is that you seldom lose a bowling ball.

(1926 – ) professional bowler
Golf Sports

It’s good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Golf Sports

On a recent survey, 80 percent of golfers admitted cheating… the other 20 percent lied.

(1941 – ) poet, author, editor & anthologist
Activities Golf Sports

Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Age Golf Sports

Golf: An ineffectual attempt to direct an uncontrollable sphere into an inaccessible hole with instruments ill-adapted to the purpose.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Golf Sports

The least thing upsets him on the links; he missed short putts because of the uproar of butterflies in the adjoining meadows.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Characteristics Golf Sports

"Play it as it lies" is one of the fundamental dictates of golf; the other is "Wear it if it clashes."

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Appearance Clothing Golf Sports