Subject: Sports » Golf (Page 7)

My handicap is that I don’t have a big enough beer cooler for the back of my golf cart.

professional football player
Golf Misspokements Sports

If you think golf is relaxing, you're not playing it right.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Golf Sports

Golf is like love. One day you think you are too old and the next day you want to do it again.

Argentinian professional golfer
Golf Sports

I’m hitting the woods just great, but I’m having a terrible time getting out of them.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Golf balls are attracted to water as unerringly as the eye of a middle-aged man to a female bosom.

(1927 – ) British journalist & author
Golf Sports

He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Golf Sports

Those trees seem to grow every year…

British professional golfer & commentator
Golf Misspokements Sports

Golf giveth and golf taketh away, but it taketh away a hell of a lot more than it giveth.

South African professional golfer
Golf Sports

I never knew what top golf was like until I turned professional… then it was too late.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports Success

Tee your ball high… the air offers less resistance than dirt.

(1940 – ) professional golfer
Golf Sports

I've heard people say putting is 50 percent technique and 50 percent mental. I really believe it is 50 percent technique and 90 percent positive thinking, see, but that adds up to 140 percent, which is why nobody is 100 percent sure how to putt.

(1935 – ) Puerto Rican professional golfer
Golf Sports

At 15 we put down my bag to hunt for a ball, found the ball, lost the bag.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

He who has the fastest golf cart never has a bad lie.

Golf Sports

Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at it.

(1910 – 1983) professional golfer
Golf Sex Sports

This one'll slide down the hill like a greased piglet.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

A tap-in is a putt that is short enough to be missed one-handed.

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Golf Sports

On a golf course, Jack had the hands of a violinist; that was fair, because as a violinist, Jack had the hands of a golfer.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Entertainment Golf Music Sports

All I've got against golf is it takes you so far from the clubhouse.

Welsh-born Scottish writer
Golf Sports

Give me a man with big hands and big feet and no brains and I'll make a golfer out of him.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either hit one more club or two more balls.

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Golf Sports

90% of the putts that are short don’t go in.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Golf Sports Yogi-isms