Subject: Sports » Golf (Page 7)

Most people play a fair game of golf… if you watch them.

(1911 – 1999) comedian, author & columnist
Golf Sports

Four-letter Word: Par for the coarse.

Definitions Golf Language Sports

You don’t know what pressure is until you play for five bucks with only two in your pocket.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Fore: A golf bawl.

Definitions Golf Sports

It is so long it’s the first time I’ve had to take into account the curvature of the earth.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

He told me he caddied in the same group with me in the Hot Springs Open. That's why I voted for him, because he was a caddie.

(1916 – 2008) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

(We) should be allowed to wear shorts; God almighty, (LPGA) women are allowed to wear ‘em, and we’ve got better legs than they do.

professional golfer
Golf Misspokements Sports

Alan Shepard walking on the moon found a golf ball with Gerald Ford’s initials on it.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Golf Sports

Golf: An ineffectual attempt to direct an uncontrollable sphere into an inaccessible hole with instruments ill-adapted to the purpose.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Golf Sports

I went to bed and I was old and washed up. I woke up a rookie… what could be better?

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Golf is the cruelest game, because eventually it will drag you out in front of the whole school, take your lunch money and slap you around.

American sportswriter
Golf Sports

You know what they say about big hitters… the woods are full of them.

(1910 – 1983) professional golfer
Golf Sports

My game is so bad I gotta hire three caddies – one to walk the left rough, one for the right rough, and one down the middle. And the one down the middle doesn't have much to do.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

There are two things you can do with your head down– play golf and pray.

(1935 – ) Puerto Rican professional golfer
Golf Sports

If you’d offered me a 69 at the start this morning I’d have been all over you.

Scottish professional golfer
Golf Misspokements Sports

Golf is like chasing a quinine pill around a cow pasture.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Activities Golf Sports

There is an old saying: If a man comes home with sand in his cuffs and cockleburs in his pants, don't ask him what he shot.

(1912 – 2002) professional golfer
Golf Sports

My handicap is that I don’t have a big enough beer cooler for the back of my golf cart.

professional football player
Golf Misspokements Sports

If you could eliminate the occasional bad shot you would be the first person to do so.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

The woods are full of long drivers.

American golf professional & coach
Golf Sports

The reason they call if ‘golf’ is that all the other four-letter words were used up.

Golf Sports