Subject: Sports » Hockey

Canada is a country whose main exports are hockey players and cold fronts; our main imports are baseball players and acid rain.

(1919 – 2000) Canadian prime minister & politician
Canada Hockey Places Science/Weather Sports

Anytime you hold Dallas to a one touchdown, it's not all bad.

Canadian hockey player, coach & general manager
Hockey Sports

The first thing I would do when I saw Bobby [Orr] coming down at me was to say a little prayer if I had time.  I’m sure I wasn’t the only goalie who did that.

Canadian professional hockey player
Hockey Sports

Call them pros, call them mercenaries – but in fact they are just grown-up kids who have learned on the frozen creek or flooded corner lot that hockey is the greatest thrill of all.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

You can throw anything in our house, but we’ll just let it roll off our backs

Activities Hockey Misspokements Sports

If I’m half the coach on the bench that I was in the stands, we’ll have no problems.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

I’m hoping for a bench clearing brawl during the warm up so I can go out and grab his stick.

Canadian hockey goaltender
Hockey Sports

The only difference between the [Phoenix] Coyotes and Days of Our Lives is that nobody has been shot on our team yet.

professional hockey player
Hockey Sports

Reporter to Brett Hull: If you were a tree, what kind of a tree would you be?

Hull: Shoe

Canadian-born American hockey player
Hockey Sports

My wife made me a millionaire. Before she divorced me, I had three million.

professional hockey player
Divorce Hockey Marriage Misspokements Sports

My goal is to deny yours.

Hockey Sports

Sometimes you think they must have come out of the chimp cages at the Bronx zoo.

Canadian hockey goalie & coach
Hockey Sports

Every time I get injured, my wife ends up pregnant.

Canadian hockey player & general manager
Hockey Sports

There are two types of forwards. Scorers and bangers. Scorers score and bangers bang.

Canadian hockey goaltender, politician, lawyer, businessman & author
Hockey Sports

I guess it's why you never say never. The only thing you can never do is ski through a revolving door.

hockey coach
Hockey Sports

We hate each other. People assume that we respect each other because we’re black. We don’t.

Canadian hockey player & commentator
Hockey Sports

By the age of 18, the average American has witnessed 200,000 acts of violence on television, most of them occurring during Game 1 of the NHL playoff series

(1966 – ) American journalist & novelist
Conflict Hockey Sports

Success is not the result of spontaneous combustion; you must first set yourself on fire.

(1925 – 1990) Canadian hockey player, coach & general manager
Hockey Sports Success

Hmm, 600 games? What does it mean? It means I’m that much closer to getting fired.

Canadian hockey player & coach
Hockey Sports

I think he knows all my tricks. Or the fact I don't have any tricks.

(1969 – ) Canadian ice hockey player & executive
Hockey Sports

He said he wanted to go play in his home country and village; I guess every village needs an idiot.

Hockey Sports