Subject: Sports » Hockey (Page 11)

He's skating like he's 36 again.

Canadian hockey player
Age Hockey Sports

The only difference between this and Custer's last stand was Custer didn't have to look at the tape afterwards.

Canadian hockey player & broadcaster
Hockey Sports

They're like two bulldogs eating lunch off a Brillo pad!

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

Hockey is the original extreme sport.

American hockey player
Hockey Sports

If I get run into again, I'm taking someone with me. I lost one knee. I'll take a head if it happens again.

Canadian hockey goaltender
Hockey Sports

Why is a puck called a puck? Because ‘dirty little bastard’ was taken.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

We are the sort of people who make health insurance popular.

Canadian hockey goaltender
Health Hockey Sports

Give blood. Play hockey. 

Hockey Sports

After I took the Olympic job, my wife said to me, ‘You love hockey more than you love me.’ I told her, ‘Yes, dear, but I love you more than hunting and fishing.’

American hockey player & coach
Hockey Sports

If I play badly I’ll pick a fight in the third, just to get into a fight. I’ll break a guy’s leg to win, I don’t care. Afterward I say, ‘Yeah, all right I played badly, but I won the fight so who gives a damn.'

Canadian hockey player
Conflict Fights Hockey Sports

Hockey belongs to the Cartoon Network, where a person can be pancaked by an ACME anvil, then expanded – accordion-style – back to full stature, without any lasting side effect.

(1966 – ) American journalist & novelist
Hockey Sports

The place was cold, and I got the feeling that the fans would have enjoyed baseball more if it had been played with a hockey puck.

professional baseball player
Baseball Hockey Sports

When he put out his arms to celebrate, [after scoring his second goal] the rest of us skated immediately to the bench and left him there all alone.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

Why doesn’t the fattest man in the world become a hockey goalie?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Appearance Body Fat Hockey

He's as old as some trees.

Canadian hockey player & coach
Age Hockey Old Sports

I guess it's why you never say never. The only thing you can never do is ski through a revolving door.

hockey coach
Hockey Sports

If you’re not going to score goals, at least make people hate you.

professional hockey player
Hockey Sports

She doesn't pay me anything. I pay her. Besides, what position can she play?

Toronto Maple Leafs owner
Hockey Sports

He brings something special. I don’t know what it is, but if you ask him, you couldn’t understand his answer.

(1961 – ) Canadian hockey player & owner
Hockey Sports