Subject: Sports (Page 10)

Fred Titmus has two short legs, one of them square.

Misspokements Sports

Doctors and scientists said breaking the four-minute mile was impossible, that one would die in the attempt; thus, when I got up from the track after collapsing at the finish line, I figured I was dead.

(1929 – ) English middle-distance athlete, physician & academic
Sports

Capece is kaput.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Sports

These days baseball is different… you come to spring training, you get your legs ready, you arms loose, your agents ready, your lawyer lined up.

American baseball player
Baseball Sports

The way my team are doing, we could get Wilt Chamberlain in a trade and find out that he's really two midgets Scotch-taped together.

American basketball player & coach
Basketball Sports

Alan Shepard walking on the moon found a golf ball with Gerald Ford’s initials on it.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Golf Sports

First triple I ever had.

(1908 – 1989) American baseball player
Baseball Communication Language Sports

Say you were standing with one foot in the oven and the other foot in a bucket of ice; according to the percentage people, you should be about perfectly comfortable.

baseball manager
Baseball Sports

The key to winning baseball games is pitching, fundamentals and three-run homers.

(1930 – 2013) American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

I'm probably the only guy who worked for (Casey) Stengel before and after he was a genius.

American baseball player
Baseball Sports

He's usually a good puller – but he couldn't get it up that time.

Australian cricketer & commentator
Misspokements Sports

A puck is a hard rubber disc that hockey players strike when they can’t hit one another. 

(1909 – 1973) American sports journalist
Hockey Sports

Some people have a chip on their shoulder; Billy has a whole lumberyard.

(1919 – 1998) American sportswriter
Baseball Characteristics Sports

Football is a fertility festival: eleven sperm trying to get into the egg; I feel sorry for the goalkeeper.

(1965 – ) Icelandic singer-songwriter
Football Sports

Swimming is a confusing sport, because sometimes you do it for fun, and other times you do it to not die.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Sports

A rematch with Mike Tyson is as attractive as Sam Fox and Maria Whittaker put together.

English boxer
Boxing Sports

Isn't it fun to go out on the course and lie in the sun?

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Beliefs Golf Honesty Lies Sports

Let’s face it, sports writers, we’re not hanging around with brain surgeons.

(1909 – 1973) American sports journalist
Intelligence People Sports

An almost inexorable baseball law: A Red Sox ship with a single leak will always find a way to sink; no team is worshipped with such a perverse sense of fatality.

American sportswriter
Baseball Sports

Here’s Wellwood, seven-and-oh in the faceoffs, plus-two, two assists, played 20 minutes, drew eight minutes on the power play, lost a tooth and a pint of blood. What a guy.

Canadian hockey player, coach & commentator
Hockey Sports

"Play it as it lies" is one of the fundamental dictates of golf; the other is "Wear it if it clashes."

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Appearance Clothing Golf Sports