Subject: Sports (Page 106)

I’m not fat.

(1950 – ) American boxer & actor
Boxing Sports

It's almost like we have ESPN.

American basketball player
Basketball Sports

I guess I’d better send my fingers to Cooperstown.

baseball player
Baseball Sports

Well, it looks like the all-star balloting is about over, especially in the National and American Leagues.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

To get my paycheck for two weeks, my family must work 200 years in Slovakia.

Slovak hockey player
Hockey Sports

There are three things in the world that he held in the smallest esteem – slugs, poets and caddies with hiccups.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Golf Sports

He's about 3′1″… I tell him to get his nose off my kneecap.

(1937 – 1995) American Major League Baseball umpire
Baseball Sports

I don’t fear death, but I sure don’t like those three-footers for par.

(1935 – ) Puerto Rican professional golfer
Characteristics Fear Golf Sports

A woman I know is engaged to a real golf nut.  They are supposed to get married next Saturday…but only if it rains.

Golf Marriage Sports

Man's got courage. Man's got guts. And I don't think he'll be with us very long.

professional football & TV commentator
Football Sports

When I ask you what club to use, look the other way and don't answer.

(1912 – 2002) professional golfer
Golf Sports

My theory of hitting was just to watch the ball as it came in and hit it.

Los Angeles Dodgers’ manager
Baseball Sports

When I was a kid, I wanted to play baseball and join the circus. With the Yankees, I've been able to do both.

American baseball player
Baseball Sports

He is the best left fielder the Cardinals have, the best center fielder they have, the best first baseman they have. He is, in short, the best ball club in St. Louis and one of the best in the world.

(1905–1982) American sportswriter
Baseball Sports

Before the first Tyson fight, Frank Bruno figures to be the biggest British disaster since the Titanic. Las Vegas will bet you even money Bruno doesn't last the first round. He's 7-1 to lose, 6-1 to get knocked out, he's probably 7-5 to get killed.

(1919 – 1998) American sportswriter
Boxing Sports

People don't know this but I helped the Cardinals win the pennant; I came down with hepatitis… the trainer injected me with it.

(1935 – ) American baseball player, sportscaster, comedian & actor
Activities Baseball Health Sports

There was larceny in his heart, but his legs were honest.

(1886 – 1969) American journalist & humorist
Baseball Sports

I'd rather have an accident than fall in love – that's how much I love motor racing.

Italian woman auto racer
Auto racing Sports

Fernando Valenzuela is the pitcher whose name sounds like a mailing address in the Lower Andes.

American sportswriter
Baseball Sports

If they cut my bald head open, they will find one big boxing glove. That's all I am.

American boxing champion
Boxing Self Sports

I’m rich; what am I supposed to do, hide it?

professional baseball player
Misspokements Sports