Subject: Sports (Page 118)

The way he’s swinging the bat, he won’t get a hit until the 20th century.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

When I got up I stuck to my plan… stumbling forward and getting hit in the face.

(1950 – ) American boxer & actor
Boxing Sports

Raise the urinals.

professional baseball player & announcer
Misspokements Sports

Andujar Cedeno to lead it off; he swings… and he is hit by a pitch… and it is hit over the wall and out of here for a home run.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

Our goal is to score 27 points. If we can get two touchdowns and three field goals, we’ve got our 27 points.

(1937 – ) American football coach
Football Misspokements Sports

Bauer taught me how to dress, how to talk — and how to drink.

(1931 – 1995) American baseball player
Baseball People Sports

That slow motion doesn't show how fast the ball was traveling.

Australian cricketer & commentator
Misspokements Sports

Ever since he’s been a little boo-aw.

Canadian hockey coach
Hockey Sports

Nothing is so bad it can’t be made worse by firing the coach.

(1919 – 1998) American sportswriter
Situations Sports

If you call on God to improve the results of a shot while it is still in motion, you are using “an outside agency” and subject to appropriate penalties under the rules of golf.

British golf writer & commentator
God Golf Sports

I saw on HBO they were advertising a boxing match: “It's a fight to the finish” … that's a good place to end.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Boxing Sports

The place was so empty, they could have had archery practice.

American football coach
Football Sports

If you watch a game, it’s fun; if you play it, it’s recreation; if you work at it, it’s golf.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Golf Sports

The playoffs separate the men from the boys, and we found out we have a lot of boys in our dressing room.

Canadian hockey general manager
Hockey Sports

Baseball is 90% mental, the other half is physical.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Baseball Characteristics Yogi-isms

I set records that will never be equaled; in fact, I hope 90% of them don’t even get printed.

(1935 – ) American baseball player, sportscaster, comedian & actor
Baseball Self Sports

Keep close count of your nickels and dimes, stay away from whiskey, and never concede a putt.

(1912 – 2002) professional golfer
Golf Sports

You may be right, but it hasn’t reached his legs yet!

Scottish football player & manager
Sports

That was a maximization of a minimization of hits.

professional baseball player
Baseball Misspokements Sports

In 1962 I was named Minor League Player of the Year… it was my second season in the bigs.

(1935 – ) American baseball player, sportscaster, comedian & actor
Baseball Self Sports

If I hit it right, it's a slice. If I hit it left, it's a hook. If I hit it straight, it's a miracle.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports