Subject: Sports (Page 121)

You have to wonder what kind of chemical reactions were taking place inside Walker’s head when he said these things.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Speech Sports

I don't hate anyone, at least not for more than 48 minutes, barring overtime.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Sports

I’m hitting the woods just great, but I’m having a terrible time getting out of them.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

I don't know what these fellows are doing, but whatever they are doing, they sure are doing it well.

American professional tennis player
Sports

I don’t think there is anybody bigger or smaller than Maradona.

English football player & manager
Misspokements Sports

You get more than one of them things and you call them Loti.

American auto racer
Auto racing Sports

I think Jessel’s philosophy about golf was something like: If all you’re going to do is chase the ball, why hit it in the first place?

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Golf Sports

I go from locker to locker, pretending the guys are here. You know, give them a little bit of a pep talk. It must be working, because we haven't lost a game yet.

hockey coach
Hockey Sports

The more I practice, the luckier I get.

(1935 – ) South African professional golfer
Golf Sports

When I lost my decathlon world record I took it like a man. I only cried for ten hours.

British Olympic decathlon champion
Sports

I asked my doctor how many more years I have left and he said, 'You're too ornery to die.'

(1929 – ) American baseball player who had a well-publicized bipolar disorder
Baseball Death Sports

Baseball is a lot like life. The line drives are caught, the squibbles go for base hits. It's an unfair game.

American baseball player
Baseball Life Sports

I’m a 4-wheel-drive pickup type of guy… so is my wife.

professional baseball player
Misspokements Sports

I always turn to the sports pages first, which records people's accomplishments; the front page has nothing but man’s failures.

(1891 – 1974) 14th U.S. Chief Justice & politician
Failure Problems Sports

The bus leaves in an hour – anyone who needs a shower, take one.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Sports

It's been very slow and dull day, but it hasn't been boring. It's been a good, entertaining day's cricket.

Cricket commentator
Sports

The Padres, after winning the first game of the doubleheader, are ahead here in the top of the fifth and hoping for a split.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

I learned a long time ago that minor surgery is when they do the operation on someone else, not you.

American basketball player
Basketball Health Sports

Baseball happens to be a game of cumulative tension but football, basketball and hockey are played with hand grenades and machine guns. 

professional hockey player
Baseball Sports

The batsman’s is Holding, the bowler’s Willey.

cricket announcer
Misspokements Sports

Being thick isn’t an affliction if you’re a footballer, because your brains need to be in your feet. And Beckham works hard, he’s brave and he crosses a ball superbly. He treats a football like he does a wife – lovingly, with caresses.

English football player & manager
Sports