Subject: Sports (Page 121)

This is really a lovely horse, I once rode her mother.

horse racing trainer & commentator
Misspokements Sports

Swing hard in case you hit it.

(1961 – ) American football player
Golf Sports

(Willie) McCovey swings and misses, and it’s fouled back.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

I feel safer on a racetrack than I do on Houston's freeways.

American auto racer
Auto racing Sports

I played golf. I did not get a hole in one, but I did hit a guy. … you're supposed to yell, Fore! but I was too busy yelling, “There ain't no way that's gonna hit him!”

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Golf Sports

I played golf with a priest the other day. He shot par-par-par-par-par. Finally I said to him, "Father, if you're playing golf like this you haven't been saving many souls lately.”

(1912 – 2002) professional golfer
Golf Sports

Stevie Wonder could make one of 23 shots.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Sports

He just got me in the right spot. In the small of the back. A good, clean, dirty hit… not that I didn't deserve it.

American hockey player
Hockey Sports

If a coach starts listening to the fans, he ends up sitting next to them.

professional basketball player & coach
Basketball Sports

If a tie is like kissing your sister, losing is like kissing your grandmother with her teeth out.

(1953 – ) American baseball player
Situations Sports

The main problem with keeping your eye on the ball is you have to take your eye off your opponent.

(1941 – ) poet, author, editor & anthologist
Golf Sports

Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft; today it’s called golf.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Golf Sports

I never blame myself when I’m not hitting. I just blame the bat, and if it keeps up, I change bats; after all, if I know it isn’t my fault that I’m not hitting, how can I get mad at myself?

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Baseball Yogi-isms

Every car has a lot of speed in it. The trick is getting the speed out of it.

American auto racer
Auto racing Autos Sports Things

Let me know if Cain is able.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Sports

Baseball's a very simple game. All you have to do is sit on your butt, spit tobacco, and nod at the stupid things your manager says.

American baseball pitcher
Baseball Sports

If you think squash is a competitive activity, try flower arrangement.

English author, actor, humorist & playwright
Sports

I wouldn’t give him a high fastball or a fast highball.

(1925 – 2005) American baseball player & manager
Baseball Sports

I’ve been in the twilight of my career longer than most people have had a career.

(1956 – ) Czech American tennis player
Sports Time

In order to resemble William Perry, we have rented a Winnebago for our offensive line to practice against.

American football player, coach & college athletics administrator
Football Sports

Sure, the home-field is an advantage — but so is having a lot of talent.

(1961 – ) American football player
Football Sports