Subject: Sports (Page 29)

Nobody but you and your caddie care what you do out there, and if your caddie is betting against you, he doesn't care, either.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer

Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at it.

(1910 – 1983) professional golfer

Get used to this phrase: “How could both referees have missed that?”

Canadian sports writer & analyst

We can’t win at home… we can’t win on the road; as general manager, I just can’t figure out where else to play.

(1941 – ) American basketball executive

Reggie Smith of the Dodgers and Gary Matthews of the homers hit Braves in that game.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer

Rugby League is war without the frills.

Every time I look up, it seems we're punting.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach

The sun has been there for 500, 600 years.

American baseball player

Nigel Mansell is the only man who goes to Nick Faldo for charisma lessons.

English actor & television personality

I’ll fight Lloyd Honeyghan for nothing if the price is right.

American professional boxer

What's the difference between a three-week-old puppy and a sportswriter? … In six weeks, the puppy stops whining.

(1939 – ) American football player & coach

Any umpire who lasts five years in the minor leagues deserves to be immortalized; any umpire who lasts ten or more years in the minors deserves to be institutionalized.

(1937 – 1995) American Major League Baseball umpire

We'll have an offensive team and a defensive team, and the other team will be in charge of carrying me off the field.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach

Enos Cabell started here with the Astros… and before that he was with the Orioles.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer

The only way of really finding out a man's true character is to play golf with him; in no other walk of life does the cloven hoof so quickly display itself.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist

He’s shown a lack of inconsistency.

Baseball is a lot like the Army, there aren't many individuals. About the only difference is that baseball players get to stay in nice hotels instead of barracks.

American baseball pitcher

The bum was up and down so many times I thought he was an Otis elevator.

boxing trainer & manager

Never break your putter and your driver in the same round or you're dead.

(1916 – 2008) American professional golfer

The fans now, with their eyes pierced on the dart board.

English sports commentator

If everything seems under control, you’re not going fast enough.

(1940 – ) Italian-American auto racer