Subject: Sports (Page 29)

Fairway: A narrow strip of closely mown grass that separates two groups of golfers looking for lost balls in the rough.

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Golf Sports

Football kickers are like taxi cabs… you can always go out and hire another one.

(1931 – 2012) American college football historian & television commentator
Football Sports

If I had a dollar for every time someone asked me that question… wait a minute, I do have a dollar for every time I've been asked that question.

American basketball player & coach
Basketball Situations Sports

Since then we've changed the locks.

Mayor of Scranton PA
Boxing Sports

Here’s Hodge on the breakaway! He’s all by himself. He shoots. And Hodge missed the goal! He’ll be thinking about that one for a while! Just look at the expression on Hodge’s stick!

Hockey Misspokements Sports

When you the man who beat the man who was the man… well, then you ‘The Man.’

American boxing champion
Boxing Sports

Some of the ravines are so deep that if you topple over, your clothes will be out of date by the time you hit the bottom.

British auto racer
Auto racing Sports

I’ve been dunked on by (Vitaly) Potapenko and now (Zan) Tabak; the good part is that they don’t make posters of those guys.

professional basketball player
Basketball Misspokements Sports

We’ll just have to see if they can keep this Cinderella slipper alive.

Basketball Misspokements Sports

You feel guilty telling the batters to go out there and get a hit. They look at you funny, as is if to say, 'you try it.‘

(1930 – 2013) American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

He's not twins.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Sports

1. Nothing is ever so bad it can't be made worse by firing the coach. 2. A free agent is anything but. 3. Whatever can go to New York will..

Activities Murphy’s Laws New York City Places Sports

I’ve never seen a game like this; every game this year has been like this.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

The way to make coaches think you’re in shape in the spring is to get a tan.

American baseball player
Baseball Sports

You rejoin us at a very appropriate time – Ray Illingworth has just relieved himself at the pavilion end!

cricket announcer
Misspokements Sports

There is one word in baseball that says it all, and that word is, ‘You never know.’

professional baseball player
Baseball Misspokements Sports

Some drivers grow the fruit. Others just come in and pick it.

British auto racer
Auto racing Sports

There are too many weird Olympic events now, like that one where the gymnasts prance around the mat swirling a piece of ribbon… it’s called ‘rhythmic gymnastics’ – unless you’re five, then it’s called ‘playing.’

(1959 – ) American stand-up comedian
Sports

Interviewer: Did you graduate from Auburn?
Charles: No, but I have a couple people working for me who did.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Education School Sports

He was the only man I ever saw who ran his own interference.

professional football player & coach
Football Sports

Rocky Marciano stood out in boxing like a rose in a garbage dump.

(1909 – 1973) American sports journalist
Boxing Sports