Subject: Sports (Page 31)

The wrong quarterback is the one that’s in there.

Football Murphy’s Laws Sports

Nolan Ryan is pitching much better now that he has his curve ball straightened out.

(1926 – 2016) American baseball player, announcer & television host
Baseball Sports

I don't think his hands could take the abuse.

(1950 – ) American boxer & actor
Boxing Sports

Bob Gibson was so mean he would knock you down and then meet you at home plate to see if you wanted to make something of it.

(1942 – ) American baseball player
Baseball Sports

I'd never buy my girl a watch… she's already got a clock over the stove.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball People Relationships Sports Women

Street hockey is great for kids. It’s energetic, competitive, and skillful… and best of all it keeps them off the street.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Misspokements Sports

Alesi is in second place, and Hill is in second place.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports

A business executive is someone who talks golf in the office and business on the golf course!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Golf People Sports

Interviewer: Did you graduate from Auburn?
Charles: No, but I have a couple people working for me who did.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Education School Sports

That’s the one with all the ‘No Passing’ signs.

Basketball Sports

There’s no crying in baseball!

(1956 – ) American movie actor
Baseball Sports TV/Movie Quotes

If you break 100, watch your golf; if you break 80, watch your business.

(1911 – 1999) comedian, author & columnist
Golf Sports Work

People think we make $3 million and $4 million a year; they don’t realize that most of us only make $500,000.00.

professional baseball player
Baseball Money Sports

Golf, like measles, should be caught young.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Age Golf Sports

If he had another hair on his back, he'd be up a tree.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

Most people play a fair game of golf… if you watch them.

(1911 – 1999) comedian, author & columnist
Golf Sports

Glenn McGrath joins Craig McDermott and Paul Reiffel in a three-ponged prace attack.


Sports

When I was recruited at Auburn, they took me to a strip joint; when I saw those titties on Buffy, I knew that Auburn met my academic requirements.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Education School Sports

There’ll be only one winner now – in every sense.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements Sports

It would be like the elephants standing up on two feet. It would be like the man being shot out of the cannon. It would be like a woman with a beard down to the floor. It would be the greatest show on earth.

(1949 – ) American boxing champion
Boxing Sports

We don’t pray after a game… that’s too late.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach
Basketball Sports