Subject: Sports (Page 34)

And there goes Juantorina down the back straight, opening his legs and showing his class.

BBC commentator
Misspokements Sports

Before Don King started insulting me I was a complete unknown in this country. Now people stop me and ask for my autograph.

British boxing manager
Boxing Sports

I wouldn't say God couldn't have got out of it, but he'd have had to throw it.

(1929 – 2016) American golfer
Golf Sports

That's one of the best sets I've seen him play[Tomas Zib] – although I should preface that by saying I haven't seen him play before

American professional tennis player
Misspokements Sports

[My] career was sputtering until [I] did a 360 and got headed in the right direction.

professional basketball player
Misspokements Sports

When they list the great things of the 20th Century, they’ll say, penicillin, Sophia Loren, jet travel and ESPN.

(1931 – 2012) American college football historian & television commentator
Entertainment Sports Television

I want to keep fighting because it is the only thing that keeps me out of the hamburger joints. If I don’t fight, I’ll eat this planet.

(1949 – ) American boxing champion
Boxing Eating Food/Drink Sports

I’ve never been swimming, and that’s because it’s never been more than half an hour since I last ate.

(1967 – ) American comedian, actor, radio personality & author
Activities Eating Food/Drink Sports

Every time I hear the name Joe Louis my nose starts to bleed.

British boxing champion
Boxing Sports

A golf swing is a collection of corrected mistakes.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Nobody remembers the guy who finished second but the guy who finished second.

American auto racer
Auto racing Sports

This is the only thing that has seen more parties than us.

American singer & songwriter (Aerosmith)
Hockey Sports

Golf… is the infallible test; the man who can go into a patch of rough alone, with the knowledge that only God is watching him, and play his ball where it lies, is the man who will serve you faithfully and well.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Golf Honesty Sports

And the line-up for the final of the Women’s 400 meters hurdles includes three Russians, two East Germans, a Pole, a Swede and a Frenchman.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements Sports

The only difference between me and General Custer is that I have to watch the films on Sunday.

College football coach
Football Sports

Why should I have become elevated to a position of first-page importance merely because I am somewhat more dexterous than most in manipulating a contrivance of catgut and wood which is commonly called a tennis racquet?

first American female professional tennis player
Sports Success

After I took the Olympic job, my wife said to me, ‘You love hockey more than you love me.’ I told her, ‘Yes, dear, but I love you more than hunting and fishing.’

American hockey player & coach
Hockey Sports

A mediocre season for Nelson Piquet as he is now known and always has been.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports

We have fifty-one golf courses in Palm Springs; he (Gerald Ford) never decides which course he will play until after the first tee shot.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Golf People Sports

As if we don’t have enough violence on television.

(1925 – 2018) U.S. first lady, wife of George H. W. Bush
Golf Sports

I'm always into a positive black image. Whenever Leon Spinks fights I always pray, 'Dear Lord, please don't let them interview Leon on TV.'

American television personality
Boxing People Sports