Subject: Sports (Page 37)

Gossage puts guys like me on his cereal for breakfast. He's the most intimidating pitcher I've ever seen.

baseball player
Baseball Sports

We don’t pray after a game… that’s too late.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach
Basketball Sports

My coach said I ran like a girl, I said if he could run a little faster he could too.

1972 – ) American soccer player
Sports Women

The best thing about baseball is that you can do something about yesterday tomorrow.

Venezuelan baseball player
Baseball Sports

Zane Smith is a guy who can shut you out as well as look at you.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

A football team is like a piano; you need eight men to carry it and three who can play the damn thing.


Sports

A lot of things run through your head when you’re going in to relieve in a tight spot… one of them was, “Should I spike myself?”

(1908 – 1989) American baseball player
Baseball Sports

My goal is to deny yours.

Hockey Sports

If you’re going to make every game a matter of life or death, you’re going to have a lot of problems… for one thing, you’ll be dead a lot.

(1931 – ) American college basketball coach
Basketball Sports

They said I was such a great prospect that they were sending me to a winter league to sharpen up.; when I stepped off the plane, I was in Greenland.

(1935 – ) American baseball player, sportscaster, comedian & actor
Baseball Sports

Reporter: Who do you think is the number one player of all time?

Logan: I’d have to go with the immoral Babe Ruth.

professional baseball player
Baseball Misspokements Sports

The uglier a man’s legs are, the better he plays golf.

Appearance Body Golf Murphy’s Laws Sports

He's gonna need an industrial-strength toothpick to pick the leather out of his teeth. I'm gonna hit this man so hard he's gonna grow an Afro.

Canadian boxer
Boxing Sports

Son, we’d like to keep you around this season but we’re going to try and win a pennant.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Baseball Misspokements Sports

I don’t know that my behavior has improved all that much with age; they just found someone worse.

American professional tennis player
Sports

The only way you can check Gretzky is to hit him when he is standing still singing the national anthem.

Boston Bruins general manager
Hockey Sports

Hell, there ain't but 15 black millionaires in the whole country & half of 'em are right here in this room.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Sports

1. Nothing is ever so bad it can't be made worse by firing the coach. 2. A free agent is anything but. 3. Whatever can go to New York will..

Activities Murphy’s Laws New York City Places Sports

… standing there making a sitting target of himself.

English boxing manager & trainer
Boxing Misspokements Sports

The place was cold, and I got the feeling that the fans would have enjoyed baseball more if it had been played with a hockey puck.

professional baseball player
Baseball Hockey Sports

The front wheel crosses the finish line, closely followed by the back wheel.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements Sports