Subject: Sports (Page 48)

If Lew could cook, I’d marry him.

baseball manager
Baseball Sports

The trouble is not that players have sex the night before a game, it’s that they stay out all night looking for it.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Baseball Sex Sports

If Larry Holmes is the people's champion, then asparagus is the people's vegetable.

sportswriter
Boxing Sports

My uncle always described an unforced error as his first marriage.

American journalist & tennis broadcaster
Marriage Sports

I know you can be fined for throwing a club, but I want to know if you can get fined for throwing a caddie?

(1916 – 2008) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Playing golf is like going to a strip joint… after 18 holes you’re tired and most of your balls are missing.

(1953 – ) comedian & actor
Golf Sports

He is accelerating all the time; the last lap was run in 64 seconds and the one before that in 62.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements Sports Time

In my sport the quick are too often listed among the dead.

Scottish auto racer
Auto racing Sports

Baseball's a very simple game. All you have to do is sit on your butt, spit tobacco, and nod at the stupid things your manager says.

American baseball pitcher
Baseball Sports

There aren't many secrets in coaching…. well, there's one secret: Get a guy like Warrick Dunn, throw him a screen pass and watch him run 52 yards with it.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Sports

Sparky is the only guy I know who’s written more books than he has read.

baseball broadcaster
Misspokements Reading/Writing Sports

If Marc Bulger throws an interception in Sun Devil Stadium and nobody is there to see it, is it still an interception?

American sports writer
Football Sports

He’s looking for some meaningful penetration into the backline.

New Zealand rugby player & commentator
Misspokements Sports

Complaints About NBA Referees Growing Ugly

Basketball Headlines Sports

Baseball is drama with an endless run and an ever-changing cast.

(1926 – 2016) American baseball player, announcer & television host
Baseball Sports

Almighty Sports with Jesus: Featuring a Heavenly Host of Righteous Adventures

Book Titles Sports

Golf is a better game played downhill.

(1940 – ) professional golfer
Golf Sports

The only qualifications for a lineman are to be big and dumb; to be a back, you only have to be dumb.

(1888 – 1931) American football player & coach
Football Intelligence Sports Stupidity

A professional will tell you the amount of flex you need in the shaft of your club. The more the flex, the more strength you will need to break the thing over your knees.

Golf Sports

I’d like to borrow [Cassius] Clay’s body for 48 hours. There are three guys I’d like to beat up and four women I’d like to make love to.

(1919 – 1998) American sportswriter
Appearance Body Boxing Sports

Actually we’re trying to get it to flood both locker rooms, just to be fair.

Nassau Coliseum general manager
Hockey Sports