Subject: Sports (Page 5)

The difference between being in a relationship and being in prison is that in prison they let you play softball on the weekends.

American stand-up comedian
Relationships Situations Sports

Ability is the art of getting credit for all the home runs somebody else hits.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Activities Baseball Characteristics Sports

They're selling video cassettes of the Ali-Spinks re-match for $89.95. Hell, for that money Leon will come to your house.

boxing physician
Boxing Sports

If he wanted me to run 26 miles through the hills, I would. If he wanted me to carry water bottles, I would. If he wanted me to get my hair cut like his… well, you have to draw the line somewhere.

American football player
Football Sports

There are only two plays that I know, Romeo and Juliet and put the damn ball in the basket.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach
Basketball Sports

If you even dream of beating me you'd better wake up and apologize.

(1942 – ) American boxing champion
Boxing Sports

Notre Dame is the only team in the country that never plays a road game.

(1931 – 2012) American college football historian & television commentator
Football Sports

Because if it doesn't work out, I don't want to blow the whole day.

American football player
Football Marriage Sports

I’ve never seen a game like this; every game this year has been like this.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

To find a man’s true character, play golf with him.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Characteristics Golf Sports

It was the toughest seven-man zone we faced all year.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach
Basketball Sports

If I ever need a heart transplant, I want his [Bobby Knight’s]… it’s never been used.

American basketball coach
Basketball Sports

He's not only a lousy fighter, he's a bad actor. Louis or Marciano could have whipped him by telephone.

American boxer
Boxing Sports

I just hope she doesn't start before I go in the Hall of Fame. That way, I won't have to kill anybody before I get inducted.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Dating Relationships Sports

All hockey players are bilingual; they know English and profanity.

(1928 – ) Canadian professional ice hockey player
Hockey Sports

Fred Titmus has two short legs, one of them square.

Misspokements Sports

My girlfriend boos when we make love because she knows it turns me on.

Puerto Rican boxer
Boxing Sports

I wish I had put ballet shoes on him and not boxing gloves.

Boxing Occupations Sports

Golfing excellence goes hand in hand with alcohol, as many an Open and Amateur champion has shown.

British golf writer & commentator
Alcohol Food/Drink Golf Sports

A ball will always come to rest halfway down a hill, unless there is sand or water at the bottom.

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Golf Sports

I've made the national anthem a six-point underdog.

American sports commentator & oddsmaker
Boxing Sports