Subject: Sports (Page 51)

If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there’d be a shortage of fishing poles.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Activities Life Sports

Hornets Will Accent Throwing Game in ’81

Headlines Sports

When Neil Armstong first set foot on the moon, he and all the space scientists were puzzled by an unidentifiable white object; I knew immediately what it was… that was a home run ball hit off me in 1933 by Jimmie Foxx.

(1908 – 1989) American baseball player
Activities Baseball Sports

These are my new shoes. They’re good shoes. They won’t make you rich like me, they won’t make you rebound like me, they definitely won’t make you handsome like me. They’ll only make you have shoes like me. That’s it.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Sports

Kent Abbott is in the on-deck circuit.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Malaprops Sports

I play sports…no I don’t… what the f**k?

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Self Sports

George 'Babe' Ruth and Old Jack Dempsey, both Sultans of Swat.
One hits where the other people are, the other where they're not.

Scottish snooker player
Baseball Boxing Sports

I know you can be fined for throwing a club, but I want to know if you can get fined for throwing a caddie?

(1916 – 2008) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Even my players aren't players.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Baseball Misspokements Sports

Sam Snead was born with a natural ability to keep his bar bills as low as his golf scores.

(1910 – 1983) professional golfer
Alcohol Golf Sports

I had to go off the circuit twice to avoid him. I don't know what Rene Arnoux is doing in Formula One racing. He should be on the beach.

Belgian auto racer
Auto racing Sports

All hockey players are bilingual; they know English and profanity.

(1928 – ) Canadian professional ice hockey player
Hockey Sports

I’m fairly confident that if I died tomorrow, Don would find a way to preserve me until the season was over and he had time for a nice funeral.

wife of coach Don Shula
Football Sports

I can do my sport no greater service.

(1950 – ) American boxer & actor
Boxing Sports

When I went to Catholic high school in Philadelphia, we just had one coach for football and basketball. He took all of us who turned out and had us run through a forest. The ones who ran into the trees were on the football team.

American basketball coach
Basketball Football Sports

Doctors tell me I have the body of a thirty year old. I know I have the brain of a fifteen year old. If you've got both, you can play baseball.

American baseball player
Appearance Baseball Body Intelligence Sports

They may have regained all 40 yards… in fact, they may have.

Football Misspokements Sports

He's skating like he's 36 again.

Canadian hockey player
Age Hockey Sports

He plays just like a union man… he negotiates the final score.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Golf Sports

If Pete Rose brings the Reds in first, they ought to bronze him and put him in cement.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

(Bruce) Benedict may not be hurt as much as he really is.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Misspokements Sports