Subject: Sports (Page 54)

There are two things you can do with your head down– play golf and pray.

(1935 – ) Puerto Rican professional golfer
Golf Sports

Keep close count of your nickels and dimes, stay away from whiskey, and never concede a putt.

(1912 – 2002) professional golfer
Golf Sports

I could stand up in the seat and not hit my head.

American auto racer
Auto racing Autos Sports Things

I never knew anybody who said they liked doubleheaders except Ernie Banks, and I think he was lying.

professional baseball player & manager
Baseball Sports

Anything happens in Grand Prix racing, and it usually does.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Misspokements Sports

There goes Juantorena down the back straight, opening his legs and showing his class.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements Sports

There's nothing that cleanses your soul like getting the hell kicked out of you.

college football coach
Football Sports

The Houston Astros are the youngest team in the National League if you judge by age.

American baseball pitcher & announcer
Age Baseball Misspokements Sports

The proper score for a businessman golfer is 90. If he is better than that he is neglecting his business. If he's worse, he's neglecting his golf.

Golf Sports

It takes longer to learn to be a good golfer than it does to become a brain surgeon. On the other hand, you don't get to ride around on a cart, drink beer, eat hot dogs and stare at the cart girl's tits all day if you are performing brain surgery.

Golf Occupations Sports Work

Two hundred million Americans, and there ain’t two good catchers among ‘em.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
America Baseball People Sports

Gold Medal Specialists. Sprints! Relays! Marathons! Hot and Raring to Go.

Sex Signs Sports

There'll be two buses leaving the hotel for the park tomorrow. The two o'clock bus will be for those of you who need a little extra work. The empty bus will leave at five o'clock.

professional baseball manager
Sports

 You mean in the state?

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach
Basketball Sports

Dr. Beeper: I thought you’d be the man to beat this year.

Ty Webb: I guess you’ll just have to keep beating yourself.

(1943 – ) American comedian, writer & actor
Golf TV/Movie Quotes

Putting allows the touchy golfer two to four opportunities to blow a gasket in the short space of two to forty feet.

(1916 – 2008) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Don King dresses like a pimp and speechifies like a store-front preacher.

boxing writer
Boxing Sports

Kent Abbott is in the on-deck circuit.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Malaprops Sports

A tie is like kissing your sister.

(1915 – 1987) American football player and coach
Sports

Marshall's bowling with his head.

Misspokements Sports

All women tennis players should go on their knees in thankfulness to Suzanne Lenglen for delivering them from the tyranny of corsets.

American professional tennis player
Appearance Clothing Sports