Subject: Sports (Page 56)

We can’t win at home… we can’t win on the road; as general manager, I just can’t figure out where else to play.

(1941 – ) American basketball executive
Basketball Misspokements Sports

I've seldom seen a horny player walk into a bar and not let out exactly what he did for a living.

(1947 – ) professional baseball player
Baseball Occupations Sex Sports Work

I’ve never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.

professional basketball player & coach
Misspokements Sports

There was larceny in his heart, but his legs were honest.

(1886 – 1969) American journalist & humorist
Baseball Sports

If you could eliminate the occasional bad shot you would be the first person to do so.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

If ever an error had ‘F’ written on it, that grounder did.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

In Willie DeWit, we have an all-American boy, even though he is a Canadian.

Boxing Misspokements Sports

It's like embalming. Nobody likes it, but somebody has to do it.

American football player
Football Sports

I used to pray to the Lord every night to make me a hockey player. Of course, I forgot to mention the NHL so I spent 16 years in the minors.

Canadian hockey player, coach & commentator
Hockey Sports

I wasn't talking to Holmes in there; every time I felt like saying something to him I found it hard because he kept putting his left hand in my mouth.

(1950 – ) American boxer & actor
Boxing Sports

More than anyone else, he's (Hank Aaron) made me wish I wasn't a manager.

American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

I never did say that you can’t be a nice guy and win; I said that if I was playing third base and my mother rounded third with the winning run, I’d trip her.

(1906 – 1991) American baseball player, coach & manager
Baseball Life Sports

"Play it as it lies" is one of the fundamental dictates of golf; the other is "Wear it if it clashes."

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Appearance Clothing Golf Sports

Managing is getting paid for home runs someone else hits.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

Now it comes to a simple equation – who can stand the heat.

British sports commentator
Boxing Misspokements Sports

They didn't hesitate: Wendy's, McDonald's, Pizza Hut, and Burger King.

Denver Bronco team nutritionist
Food/Drink Football Sports

I never got many questions about my managing. I tried to get twenty-five guys who didn't ask questions.

(1930 – 2013) American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

I learned a long time ago that minor surgery is when they do the operation on someone else, not you.

American basketball player
Basketball Health Sports

You don’t realize how easy this game is until you get up in that broadcasting booth.

(1931 – 1995) American baseball player
Baseball Sports

Statistics and records are baseball talk; they keep records like most times sliding into second base on a Tuesday.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Baseball Football Sports

He can run, but he can't hide.

(1914 – 1981) American boxing champion
Boxing Sports