Subject: Sports (Page 66)

A lot of the people who make these suggestions would have a hard time filling out the application forms to work at 7-Eleven.

baseball player
Baseball Sports

My face is my mask.

Canadian professional hockey goalie
Hockey Sports

By the age of 18, the average American has witnessed 200,000 acts of violence on television, most of them occurring during Game 1 of the NHL playoff series

(1966 – ) American journalist & novelist
Conflict Hockey Sports

Some coaches pray for wisdom; I pray for 260-pound tackles… they’ll give me plenty of wisdom.

(1932 – ) American football coach
Football Intelligence Sports Wisdom

Hockey’s the only place where a guy can go nowadays and watch two white guys fight.


(1938 – 2017) American sportswriter & novelist
Conflict Fights Hockey Sports

It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball; I did it in one afternoon on the golf course.

(1934 – ) American baseball player
Baseball Golf

There is nothing wrong with the car except that it is on fire.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Problems Sports

Fred Davis, the doyen of snooker, now 67 years of age and too old to get his leg over, prefers to use his left hand.

BBC commentator
Misspokements Sports

That’s the fastest time ever run – but it’s not as fast as the world record.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements Sports

That is because I don't have one.

American football player
Football Sports

This is the only thing that has seen more parties than us.

American singer & songwriter (Aerosmith)
Hockey Sports

Stewart has two cars in the top five: Magnusson 5th and Barichello 6th.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports

Gerry Cooney can't fight to keep warm.

Boxing press agent
Boxing Sports

(He) simply lost that sun-blown popup.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

We take the shortest route to the puck and arrive in ill humor.

professional hockey player
Hockey Sports

One time, I got pulled over at four a.m.; I was fined seventy-five dollars for being intoxicated and four-hundred for being with the Phillies.

(1935 – ) American baseball player, sportscaster, comedian & actor
Baseball Driving Sports

If he wanted me to run 26 miles through the hills, I would. If he wanted me to carry water bottles, I would. If he wanted me to get my hair cut like his… well, you have to draw the line somewhere.

American football player
Football Sports

He’s listed as day to day, but, then again, aren’t we all?

(1956 – ) born Daniel Patrick Pugh, American sportscaster & radio personality
Sports

Howard Cosell is nobody’s fool. He’s everybody’s fool.

(1942 – ) American boxing champion
Boxing Insults Sports

The difference between the mile and the marathon is the difference between burning your fingers with a match and being slowly roasted over hot coals.

American author & runner
Sports

It’s Steffi’s [Graf] forehand off both sides.

(1954 – ) American professional tennis player
Sports