Subject: Sports (Page 70)

I used to go to the driving range to practice driving without slicing; now I go to the driving range to practice slicing without swearing.

(1941 – ) poet, author, editor & anthologist
Communication Golf Speech Sports

They’ve taken the foot off Johnny Grubb… uh, they’ve taken the shoe off Johnny Grubb.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

As a person gets older he doesn't get faster. Our quarterback will run from fright or lack of protection.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Sports

Playing goal is like being shot at.

professional hockey goalie
Hockey Sports

I just stood there watching him walk past and thinking, ‘I don’t know what that is, but I know there weren’t two of them on Noah’s Ark.’

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

Beavers Trap Trojans

Headlines Sports

You’d be a overweight neurotic fighter too if your name was Shirley Crabtree.

Sports

Why should I have become elevated to a position of first-page importance merely because I am somewhat more dexterous than most in manipulating a contrivance of catgut and wood which is commonly called a tennis racquet?

first American female professional tennis player
Sports Success

Urban should know. Almost 30 of his players have been arrested over the years, so he apparently knows a bad guy when he sees one.

sports reporter
Football Sports

I used to play golf with a guy who cheated so badly that he once had a hole in one and wrote down zero on his scorecard.

professional golfer
Characteristics Golf Honesty Sports

One under a tree, one under a bush, one under the water.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Golf

I know their mother… she'd give them all my plays.

college football coach
Family Football Sports

Sparky is the only guy I know who’s written more books than he has read.

baseball broadcaster
Misspokements Reading/Writing Sports

We don’t pray after a game… that’s too late.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach
Basketball Sports

Young Tight Ends Excite Coaches

Football Headlines Sports

I'd love to fight Gerry Cooney. But I have my price – 25 cents and a loose woman.

(1950 – ) American boxer & actor
Boxing Sports

Jake LaMotta and I fought six times. We almost got married.

(1921 – 1989) American boxing champion
Boxing Sports

Baseball is the only game left for people. To play basketball, you have to be 7 feet 6 inches. To play football, you have to be the same width.

(1914 – 1986) American baseball team owner & promoter
Baseball Sports

If I had a dollar for every time someone asked me that question… wait a minute, I do have a dollar for every time I've been asked that question.

American basketball player & coach
Basketball Situations Sports

If cocaine were helium, the NBA would float away.

American sportscaster
Basketball Sports

I've thrown or broken a few clubs in my day. In fact, I guess at one time or another I probably held distance records for every club in the bag.

(1916 – 2008) American professional golfer
Golf Sports