Subject: Sports (Page 76)

Blind people come to the park just to hear him pitch.

professional baseball player
Baseball Sports

These people haven’t seen the last of my face. If I go down, I’m going down standing up.

American basketball player
Basketball Misspokements Sports

Opening games make me nervous; to tell the truth, I’d rather open with our second game.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Misspokements Sports

I believe in higher education… you know, 6'8", 6'9", 6'10."

Basketball Sports

One road trip we were stuck on the runway for seven hours. The plane kept driving and driving until we arrived at the rink and I realized we were on a bus.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports Travel

Rugby is a game for men with no fear of brain injury.

(1958 – 2006) English radio performer, stand-up comic & writer
Sports

You don't hesitate with Michael, or you'll end up on some poster in a gift shop someplace.

American basketball player
Basketball Sports

The only way to avoid hitting a tree is to aim at it.

Golf Murphy’s Laws Sports

Losing the Super Bowl is worse then death… you have to get up in the morning.

(1918 – 1990) football coach
Football Sports

The reason women don’t play football is because eleven of them would never wear the same outfit in public.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Appearance Clothing Football Sports

We'll be back with the recrap after this message.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

Alesi is in second place, and Hill is in second place.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports

At the start of the seventh round of a match with Jack Thompson, Sam Langford extended his glove, which was the usual ritual done before the final round of a boxing match.
A puzzled Thompson said: This ain't the last round, Sam.
Langford replied: It is for you.

Canadian boxer
Boxing Sports

There are two types of forwards. Scorers and bangers. Scorers score and bangers bang.

Canadian hockey goaltender, politician, lawyer, businessman & author
Hockey Sports

Most of my clichés aren’t original.

football coach
Misspokements Sports

Richards swings, the ball bounces foul and hits him in the head… no harm done.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

She’s not [runner] Ben Johnson… but then, who is.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements Sports

I don't want to play golf. When I hit a ball, I want someone else to go chase it.

professional baseball player
Baseball Golf Sports

The only thing you should force in a golf swing is the club back in the bag.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Sure, as long as he ties a 56 lb. weight to each leg.

English boxing champion
Boxing Sports

If everything seems under control, you’re not going fast enough.

(1940 – ) Italian-American auto racer
Autos Situations Sports