Subject: Sports (Page 77)

It’s difficult to play against a man… I mean Martina. She scares you with those big muscles.

Czech professional tennis player
Misspokements Sports

Kent Abbott is in the on-deck circuit.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Malaprops Sports

Hockey is a sport for white men; basketball is a sport for black men; golf is a sport for white men dressed like pimps.

professional golfer
Appearance Clothing Golf Sports

Sure, the home-field is an advantage — but so is having a lot of talent.

(1961 – ) American football player
Football Sports

God said to Faldo, as He once said to Nicklaus, "You will have the skills like no other." Then he whispered to Ballesteros, as he whispered to Palmer, "But they will love you more."

American sportswriter
Golf Sports

Nice guys finish last.

(1906 – 1991) American baseball player, coach & manager
Baseball Sports

You usually wind up staying up all night, or until your best player comes in.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Sports

I was three over, one over a house, one over a patio, and one over a swimming pool.

(1953 – ) American baseball player
Golf Sports

Mike Caldwell, the Padres’ right-handed southpaw, will pitch tonight.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

Well, that was a cliff-dweller.

professional baseball manager
Baseball Malaprops Sports

I went skiing last week and broke a leg… fortunately it wasn’t mine.

Sports

It's kind of like tumbling around inside a giant clothes-drier.

American motorcycle racer
Sports

The last time I played golf with President Ford he hit a birdie – and an eagle, a moose, an elk, an aardvark…

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Golf People Sports

 It’s obvious these Russian swimmers are determined to do well on American soil.

British swimmer & sports commentator
Misspokements Sports

My goal is to deny yours.

Hockey Sports

I was the worst hitter ever; I never even broke a bat until last year when I was backing out of the garage.

(1908 – 1989) American baseball player
Baseball Sports

I'm gonna ask the Falcons for so much money they'll have to put me on layaway.

American football player
Football Money Sports

I keep a picture of O. J. Simpson at my side at all times to remind me of the days when I knew how to coach.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Sports

Hockey is a mans game children can play, the other sports are children’s games that men play.

Hockey Sports

By the time a man can afford to lose a golf ball, he can't hit it that far.

(1946 – 1994) writer & humorist
Age Golf Old Sports

Son, nobody is half as good as Mickey Mantle.

baseball player
Baseball Sports