Subject: Sports (Page 78)

They say losing builds character. I have all the character I need.

American football coach
Football Sports

Nobody remembers the guy who finished second but the guy who finished second.

American auto racer
Auto racing Sports

All I’m asking for is what I want.

professional baseball player
Misspokements Sports

Life is just a place where we spend time between games.

(1925 – 1990) Canadian hockey player, coach & general manager
Hockey Sports

A mediocre season for Nelson Piquet as he is now known and always has been.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports

In football everything is complicated by the presence of the opposite team.


(1905 – 1980) French existentialist philosopher, playwright & novelist,
Football Sports

Pete Rose has three thousand hits and three thousand fourteen overall.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

If I get run into again, I'm taking someone with me. I lost one knee. I'll take a head if it happens again.

Canadian hockey goaltender
Hockey Sports

I can see them buying Mauer the city of Duluth.

baseball sports writer & analyst
Baseball Sports

Drive: A shot that comes after the whiff and before the mulligan.

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Golf Sports

Singles hitters drive Fords, home run hitters drive Cadillacs.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Sports

Talking to a golf ball won't do you any good, unless you do it while your opponent is teeing off. 


(1941 – ) poet, author, editor & anthologist
Communication Golf Sports

He stings like a bee, but lives like a W.A.S.P.

Irish radio & television presenter
Boxing Sports

I've got it made. I've got a wife and a TV set… and they're both working.

1922 – 2006) American boxing champion
Boxing Sports

Grass is for cows.

Czech tennis player
Sports

Reporter: What did you think about the collective bargaining proposal?

Payton: (making $2,700,000 per year): People would have to cut their lifestyle, and they’d live like penny-pinchers.

professional football coach
Misspokements Money Sports

The fans now, with their eyes pierced on the dart board.

English sports commentator
Misspokements Sports

I’ll bet the hardest thing about prize fightin’ is pickin’ up yer teeth with a boxin’ glove on.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Boxing Sports

Oh God, if there be cricket in heaven, let there also be rain.


Sports

I'd trade Larry Murphy for a shaved monkey who could skate and a bucket of pucks.

Hockey Sports

Hockey is a sport for white men; basketball is a sport for black men; golf is a sport for white men dressed like pimps.

professional golfer
Appearance Clothing Golf Sports