Subject: Sports (Page 79)

Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Sports

High sticking, tripping, slashing, spearing, charging, hooking, fighting, unsportsmanlike conduct, interference, roughing… everything else is just figure skating. 

Hockey Sports

Grand Prix driving is like balancing an egg on a spoon while shooting the rapids.

British racing driver
Auto racing Sports

When I lost my decathlon world record I took it like a man. I only cried for ten hours.

British Olympic decathlon champion
Sports

He's skating like he's 36 again.

Canadian hockey player
Age Hockey Sports

Not being born to parents who were accountants was probably my biggest mistake.

British boxing champion
Boxing Miscellaneous Sports

I feel safer on a racetrack than I do on Houston's freeways.

American auto racer
Auto racing Sports

Senna’s car is absolutely unique, apart from the one following, which is identical.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Auto racing Colemanballs Misspokements Sports

The gap between the two cars is 0.9 of a second, which is less than one second.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports Time

I always insist that my team be in bed before breakfast.

English cricketer
Sports

The other teams could make trouble for us if they win.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Baseball Yogi-isms

Early in the year, after a bad game, I said to my kids in the car, this is my last year and the next day I was getting phone calls from the school about whether I was retiring.  And that was in October.

(1961 – ) Canadian hockey player & owner
Hockey Sports

A ball will always come to rest halfway down a hill, unless there is sand or water at the bottom.

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Golf Sports

We (the Mets) are a much improved ball club, now we lose in extra innings!

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

I know I've got a lock on the Dutch Hall of Fame.

Dutch-born American baseball pitcher
Baseball Places Sports

Nutrition makes me puke.

(1929 – ) American baseball player who had a well-publicized bipolar disorder
Baseball Food/Drink Sports

I don’t enjoy playing video golf because there’s nothing to throw.

American professional golfer
Entertainment Golf Sports

Statistics are to baseball what a flaky crust is to Mom’s apple pie.

(1926 – 1991) American television journalist
Baseball Science/Weather Sports

 If you get three strikes, even the best lawyer in the world can’t get you off.

(1914 – 1986) American baseball team owner & promoter
Baseball Sports

All hockey players are bilingual; they know English and profanity.

(1928 – ) Canadian professional ice hockey player
Hockey Sports

We're right next to Mile High Stadium. I'm no rocket scientist, but… uh… [smile]

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports